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About MartyT

  • Rank
    Grief Counselor
  • Birthday 02/10/1943

Previous Fields

  • Your relationship to the individual who died
    mother, daughter, friend, pet parent
  • Date of Death
    5/26/67, 9/3078,10/06/93
  • Name/Location of Hospice if they were involved:

Contact Methods

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Profile Information

  • Your gender
  • Location (city, state)
    Sarasota, Florida

Recent Profile Visitors

10,756 profile views
  1. It's always the so-called "woulda, shoulda, coulda" thoughts that drive us mad when something like this happens, my dear. It's because we'd give anything to re-write this story so we can change the ending. I'm so sorry that this happened to you and your Dixie. See Loss and The Burden of Guilt and Guilt: A Dangerous Villain ♥️
  2. I think that is one of the greatest benefits of a forum like this one. See Grief Support Online: An Invitation ♥️
  3. Yes, Kay. Wise words from one who knows. See also In Grief: Setting Clear Boundaries ♥️
  4. Kay, I'd forgotten about the EFT article ~ thank you for recommending it ♥️ It's yet another amazing and effective way to lessen the pain of loss . . .
  5. If you find yourself unable to shake these awful images, my dear, you might be interested in learning about this: In Grief: Using Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR)
  6. I cannot think of a more innocent thing you could have done, my dear. To think that such an innocent act would result in the death of your dog is beyond imagination, and I don't know how you (or anyone else for that matter) could have foreseen such a tragic outcome. I hope you will find it in your heart to forgive yourself, just as I am sure your beloved Lexi has already forgiven you. After all, that is one of the reasons we love our canine companions so much: They love us unconditionally. They are far more forgiving than we humans are, and they don't hold grudges. Surely Lexi knew how very much you love her and that you'd never do anything to hurt her. This was an ACCIDENT, with no intention on your part to bring harm to your beloved fur baby. I believe she knows that, and I hope you do, too. ♥️
  7. WEBINAR: "I'M LOSING HIM BEFORE HE'S GONE" - COPING WITH ANTICIPATORY GRIEF JULY 28, 2020, 12:00 PM-1:00 PM EASTERN LIVE WEBINAR REGISTER NOW When a loved one is facing a life-threatening illness or injury, grief is a natural reaction not only to the anticipation of death, but also to all the losses associated within the course of an illness or injury. Anticipatory grief can also be present when a loved one is living with other forms of illness such as addiction, traumatic brain injury, or dementia. The grief is not unlike the traumatic stress that can affect those whose loved ones are in danger due to combat. Anticipatory grief makes us keenly aware of "what was" when the threat of death seems imminent. Presented by the TAPS Institute for Hope and Healing®, this live webinar with Dr. Ken Doka discusses strategies to support yourself or someone else who is experiencing anticipatory grief. FEATURING KEN DOKA, PHD, MDIVDr. Doka is a Senior Bereavement Consultant to Hospice Foundation of America (HFA) and recipient of the 2019 Lifetime Achievement Award from the Association for Death Education and Counseling (ADEC). He serves as editor of HFA's Living with Grief® book series and its Journeys bereavement newsletter. He is a prolific author, editor, and lecturer; past president of ADEC; and a member and past chair of the International Work Group on Death, Dying, and Bereavement (IWG). In 2018, the IWG presented Doka with the Herman Feifel Award for outstanding achievement in thanatology. He received an award for Outstanding Contributions in the Field of Death Education from ADEC in 1998. Doka is an ordained Lutheran minister and a licensed mental health counselor in the state of New York. PROGRAM DETAILS This webinar is free and open to the public. Continuing education credit is not available for this program.
  8. Wise advice, and I hope you take it to heart. Mixing Grief With Alcohol: Will It Lead to Addiction?
  9. I'm so sorry to learn of the tragic accident that took the life of your beloved Lexi, and the animal lovers you will find in this forum understand too well how much this hurts. In addition to the articles Kay suggested, you might find these helpful as well: Pet Loss: Is It a Different Kind of Grief? Pet Loss: Why Does It Hurt So Much? Pet Loss: When Guilt Overshadows Grief
  10. Me, too, Marg. That's why the same quotation has appeared on the home page of my Grief Healing website since it was launched 20 years ago! ♥️
  11. If it brings you comfort and joy, my friend, to believe that your wife's spirit was in that bird, then who is to say it isn't true? ♥️
  12. There was indeed a glitch, Kay. Ordinarily I am notified immeditely via email when a new member registers (for security purposes, before anyone is permitted to post on our site, every new member applicant must be validated/screened by me, so as to protect our site from inappropriate use from advertisers, robots, etc.) Suddenly (unbeknownst to me) around the first of June this year, any notice that had been sent via my AOL address from this site did not come through. Once I discovered (by accident) that several new members had been awaiting validation, a solution was found, those members awaiting validation were approved, and suddenly their posts appeared. I think the problem has been solved now, since once again I am being notified via email as soon as someone registers.
  13. I'm so sorry, Nutski, to learn of the death of your dad ~ the man who was your hero. I'm sorry, too, that as a youngster you were told that you had to be "strong" in response to a significant loss. The thing is, grief doesn't "go" anywhere. It just lies there,waiting for us to take care of it. If we don't deal with it at the time, if we try to bury it or ignore it, grief has a way of commanding our attention, sometimes when we least expect it ~ and if we don't meet it head-on, it can come out every which way but straight, in the form of misplaced anger, depression, physical ailments, or any number of other ways. The good news is that it is never too late to do the work of mourning. What do I mean by that? I invite you to read the following. Note the additional resources listed at the base of each article, too: In Grief: Feeling Disconnected from Feeling Bad Finding Crying Time in Grief In Grief: Taking Time to Mourn Bereavement: Doing the Work of Grief
  14. I want to share with all of you a recent article that features Dr. David Fajgenbaum ~ a remarkable young doctor whom I met online several years ago when he was a young college student mourning the death of his mother. David eventually went on to found Actively Moving Forward®, which today has grown to become a nationwide grief support network of young adults, for young adults and college students ages 18-25 years old. Having been diagnosed with Castleman disease, a rare condition that nearly cost him his life five times over (!), David has since graduated medical school and is now an associate professor at the University of Pennsylvania Perelman School of Medicine, where he leads the school's Center for Cytokine Storm Treatment & Laboratory. For the last few years, he has dedicated his life to studying the disease that almost killed him. He tells his story in his book Chasing My Cure: A Doctor's Race to Turn Hope into Action; A Memoir ~ and now he has focused his skills and attention to researching and finding a treatment for COVID-19. I'm hoping this article will reassure you that there really ARE some of the best medical minds working on COVID-19! See After saving his own life with a repurposed drug, a professor reviews every drug being tried against Covid-19. Here's what he's found ❤️
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