jess22

Hi William Just hang in there. it is a really difficult journey we are going through. It has been 5 months for me and it is hard. I think it is comforting to hear from people like KayC, Karen and Derek who have been in this a while. Their words always keep me going, especially on those really difficult days. Let us know how you are getting on. Take care and lots of hugs Jessica

Hi LOren Sorry about your loss. All you feel at present is normal, so do not beat yourself up. You will get a lot of support from people on this site. Like you my partner died in a car crash 5 months ago, he was only 31 and it is a terrible shock. Together with visiting this site I found keepng a journal very useful. Like what Derek is saying do not let what people say upset you. People who have not experienced what we are experiencing do not have an idea. The sometimes do not understand. Jessica

Hi Erica I think we all go through this grieving process in our own unique way. It was exactly 5 months yesterday since my partner James was killed, and I still cry whilst driving to and from work and some days are just a blur.I am always thinking about him day and night. People say it will get "easier" with time but at this stage I sometimes wonder if that will ever be the case. I went back to work straight after James' funeral and some days were impossible to go through. I sometimes wondered how I got myself to and from work.Like KayC I stay at work long just to avoid coming home and not seeing James. Just take everyday as it comes and sometimes you may only need to cope with hour by hour. Be kind to yourself. Jessica

HI Gail I do understand the pain you are going through and like other members have already mentioned it is normal to feel that way. Dont be hard on yourself, allow yorself to cry, I find that crying helps to release the emotional pain I am experiencing.I also do still cry myself to sleep everyday and feel like ending it all but I know how painful loosing a loved one is and would not like my family and friends to go through this awful experince.I lost my partner March 07, he was my rock and everyday is a battle to carry on, but you have to try put one foot in front of the other in your own pace. Some days I feel like curling up in bed and not go out to work and I just do that.Grieving is a process and just take every day as it comes and at times every hour at a time. I find counselling and keeping a diary does help and visiting this forum is fantastic for support. Everyone here understands your pain and willing to offer support anytime. Best wishes, and hang in there. Jessica

Hi Lori Congratulations on taking such a big step, that is very courageous of you and an inspiration to other members. Lots of hugs Jessica

HI Dusky Thanks for sharing that with us. I am one of the new members and I have to say, it has been really comforting to read other peoples messages and the support is really good. Thanks Jessica

Hi Thanks for your kind words, it is reassuring to hear that you all have been through the similar experience and are here to provide comforting words. it is really difficult and some days are worse than others. Today has been really difficult, could not do anything but cry, I feel extremely exhausted and numb. My mom came over and it has been nice to have another person in the house. Thanks Jessica

Lyn I am so sorry, Like you I lost my partner 3 months ago and still feel numb. I know that may not be a consolation but, you are at the right place here. I will keep you in my prayers and take each day as it comes. Jessica

I have been reading your messages and it has been really comforting to be able to share feelings with people who understand what I am experiencing. I lost my boyfriend James on the 29th March 07, he was killed in a car crash. He was 31 and the suddeness of his death has left me really confused, hurting and feeling completey lost. Nothing in life makes sense anymore and I feel I have in a way stopped living when he died and am just existing. It has been 3 months since he died and I have been crying everyday and miss him more with each day that goes by.The pain is so raw,and at age of 33 none of the people I know have an idea of what I am going through and there are no words to describe the intensity of my pain. He was such a fantastic person and we loved and adored each other, and life feels really empty without him. He was my friend, my lover, companion and we were really happy together. We both had a lot to look forward to and I feel we were both cheated of what could have a fantastic future together. For a while, everything just felt like a really nasty nightmare and was hoping that it will all be over and I will have my James back.I went back to work 3 days after his funeral and carried on with work like before. I now think that "autopilot mode" has worn off and the reallness of my situation is very painful. Does the pain get any better? Jessica