Hi all, This is my first post, although I have been reading many entries. It is comforting to have found a site where people are so helpful and supportive of each another. I, too, am really struggling with the recent, unexpected loss of my Mom. She passed away suddenly from a brain aneurysm 3 months ago, leaving us all in a state of shock. I was on the phone with her the night before. She was absolutely fine ... no sickness or symptoms whatsoever. I miss her terribly, as we were best friends and each other's confidantes. So many people who "get it" have honestly told me that it gets worse before it gets better. I am realizing how very true that is. Because her passing was so sudden, we were all so numb during the wake/funeral. The 3 months following have been so emotional and incredibly sad. For whatever reason, she was just ripped away from us and we all feel completely robbed. I feel bad that she, too, was robbed of more time with my Dad, we 4 kids, her 5 grandchildren, and her new friends and activities she was beginning to enjoy in retirement. Sometimes, I still cannot believe that she is actually gone ... and I cannot imagine that I will never have the chance to talk to her or see her again (at least in "this" life). I am experiencing much of what you all seem to be feeling ... sadness, depression, not wanting to speak or spend time with others, etc. They say that "time heals" but I know that I will never be the same again. My poor Dad is so sad too, as he lost his love of 60 years. They met when she was 13. I worry so much about him now ... we are very close too and we have been spending much time together. My family/siblings are extremely close also, but sometimes, I feel like even they cannot provide the comfort I need. We are all grieving in different ways and at different paces, which I suppose is normal. I have cried every day for the past 92 days and believe that it is good to work through the grief process naturally. I read in one of my grief books that death/loss can be "assaulting" on the body and I am definitely emotionally and physically exhausted as never before. Being an athlete, this is very strange for me. I am typically the happy-go-lucky type, but losing my Mom has really rocked my world. Everything reminds me of her ... I can't listen to music right now & break down when any sad song comes on the radio when I am out. Forget going to CVS. I even cried today watching a "Snickers" commercial, as it was her favorite candy bar and I always used to give her one with her birthday gifts. Very, very sad here and looking to communicate with others who "get it". Anyway, I just thought I would share my story with all of you who undoubtedly understand what I am going through. I feel for you guys too ... Be well and thanks for reading, Maureen
