TraceyF

It's such a comforting and warming feeling knowing that our loved ones are with us still. My mum died 4 months ago from cancer, and before she died, gave me 2 things to look for as a sign she was looking after me. It took 4 weeks before I heard the song for the first time when I was in a shop. I burst into tears, but they were of happiness as well as sadness, and mostly gratefulness. I knew that she would come, and I was so happy for it to have happened. The 2nd sign came soon after as I saw the image on TV. Since then, I've seen this same thing nearly on a daily basis, and it's not a day-to-day thing either! Not a coincidence at all! There has been a 3rd item join the list, which I don't think mum would have thought of prior but now it makes perfect sense. Her nickname in primary school was 'Kooka' (after her laugh which sounds like an Australian Kookaburra!). For some reason I mentioned this to the funeral celebrant, and she put it in the eulogy. My mum told me that when she was having chemo she dreamt that I died in a car crash on my daily commute. When she awoke she asked that I be spared, and that she goes instead - now when I drive, I see several kookaburras every day. They just aren't that common. I miss my mum so much, but know that she is with me. I am very lucky to have had her be so open to things, and to leave me with very specific things to look for, which now makes the more subtle things much easier to spot.

If it's worth anything Christian, I am in exactly the same situation. My mum died 4 months ago, and I am at university studying psychology (albeit as a mature age student - I'm 30) and finding it very difficult to concentrate and remember anything. Last week I totally forgot about an online test that is worth 15%. I wrote it down, remembered the day before, and even had a sticky note on my computer. I still forgot I am talked to the school counsellor to get extensions on assignments before mum died and I was her main carer, and am booked in to see her again next week. I hope she can help me. I was planning on deferring this semester but found myself in the same predicament - would lose my scholorship, get fails for the enrolled units, and would still have to pay the loans. So I decided to stay, and am working through it. If I can suggest one thing, it is to be as open as you can with you lecturers/tutors and/or course coordinator. I find it very hard to ask for help, and almost feel like since it's been 4 months, that I am making excuses. No-one told me it was going to be (much) harder as time went on. "Time heals" seems like a big lie at the moment. I am so sad, lonely and unsure of myself. I want my memory back, and I miss my mum so much. I'm thinking of you Christian. xx