mel0702003

Mommy loves you baby and is so mad that you were not able to say anything to me. I was in amazement over the baby that you were and that you were my first little girl and the last baby that I would have. The last time I saw you is not the memory that I want so I think of you on the morning that I took you to the babysitter and you just smiled at me so big and it seemed as if nothing was wrong. I so wish that you could tell me that it was not my fault and that you were fine and that you did not hurt or cry. You did not go through any pain. I miss you so much that my words cannot even explain but know that you are in my heart and mind everyday and that I hope that you are watching over your brothers and I to make sure that we all stay in line. I love you and I miss you. Love, Mommy

Our lives a mess and our hearts out of place. All because we miss seeing your smiling face. Everyday the question will be why? Why did you have to die? Why did you leave without saying goodbye? Was I going to be able to take care of you? Was I going to make you feel better when you were feeling sad and blue? Nothing hurts more in my heart then to know that for now we are apart. Please come to me in my dreams Make everything easier than what it seems. Let me know that you are ok Let me know that we will meet one day. God grant me the serenity to accept the things that I cannot change. I cannot change the fact that you are gone but I do accept that your spirit will be here with me. Your in the arms of an Angel now I know you will give me the strenght to make it somehow.

I have just lost my 5 mon.old daughter the day after Easter April 12, 2004. Her name was Morgan. I went to work and when I came back to get her from daycare I found her not living after being out down for a nap. My two boys and I witnessed the most horrifying thing in our lives and I do not know how to get through it myself let alone help my boys. I have bad dreams and for some odd reason Sundays and Mondays are the worst days for me and I do not know why. I miss her so much and I am so angry that she is gone. I know that I feel guilty and I do not know what else to feel besides emptiness and the coldness that I felt from her the last time that I touched her and held her. I never thought that there was such a pain that existed and I am asking and actually calling for mothers to help me through this. I am nothing without my children and I do not have a phone to call anyone. I no longer have my own home I mean my life is a mess so I am hoping that God will help me out here and get someone to help me make it through and get me to open up because right now I am pretty closed because I feel that nobody understands what I am going through. Thank you!