Hi, I lost my husband in dec.2001 and he had only been sick for 2 months and before that he had never been sick. We got married when he was 18 and I was 17, so as you can see we grew up together. We have 5 children and they all live near me. We were married 41 years and I don't even remember the first year after his death, it like a black hole to me. We went everywhere together and we made decicion together although he paid all the bills. right now I feel like I am greiving mor now than when he first died. What makes it even harder is that I haven't been able to cry at all. This may sound silly but I feel I must set an example for my grown children. My husband and I were also rasing 2 granddaughters and they felt their papa was their father as their father never came around. During this summer the granddaughters have gone to stay with their mother and I still can't cry and I feel so alone. There are days that I don't feel like going on but I know I have to. I have been to dr. and Ian on some medication that is helping some. I also am trying to find everything on greiving and I noe understand it takes some people longer than others and it is truly hard on a person as you go through it. I also know the lord never gives more than we can handle. god Bless Joanie
