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pqgeorge

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  1. I feel the same way you feel, believe me. Losing my Mom and Dad within 5 years of each other has been horrible to say the least. I lost my Mom just 4 weeks ago on September 6th, due to complications with lung cancer. My Dad left us on April 29, 1999 @ 7:42 PM. I know, I was there when he died. Like many siblings, my family is no exception when it comes to problems. Other than my wife, I really have no one to turn to. My oldest brother is "all business" and rarely shows any emotion whatsoever. My next brother is suffering from a degenerative muscle wasting disease and barely can walk or talk. My next brother is totally out of the loop with the family, thanks to his wife's instigative tendencies (and I'll leave it at that). My final brother, who I trust and respect, lives clear across the country and I really cannot burden him with my sadness as he has a life and plenty of kids. God love him. When my Dad died 5 years ago, it took me nearly 3 years to show some signs of "living" again. But, nothing prepared me for what I have now with my Mom dying. I'm totally lost without my Mom. Cigarettes were the main contributing factor of my parent's deaths. There was no reason for my parents to die in their early to mid 70's. If only they knew what their deaths would do to us as a family. Ironically, the brother who disrespected and tormented my Mom for the last three years was the last person to see her alive. He refused to call or see her for over 3 years. Just played mind games with her. He finally went to see her while she lay there dying. Within 24 hours of his first visit, the night before, he returned to the hospital and she was gone within a couple of hours. I adored my Mom and tried to do everything within my power to make sure she was comfortable and happy. I know that this is a bad thing to say, but I wonder why God did not take that brother instead of my Mom or Dad. The only consolation I have is that he now has to live with himself, considering the way he treated my Mom while she was alive. I will never forgive him for what he did. Any forgiveness will have to come from a "higher source". -Pete
  2. I am sure she knows how much you love her. There is nothing stronger than the love of a mother and her children. My Mom was living proof on that. I lost my Mom on 9/6/04. But like you, I know that she (and my Dad) would want me to go on and live life to the fullest. Keep your Mom's memory alive and go on and live your life to the fullest, no matter what way you want to live it. Take care. All the best! Pete
  3. Hi Jules: I'm so sorry about the loss of your Mum. Like you, my Mom was the best friend I had in the world. Ever since my Dad died in 1999, we became very close. My wife really took the loss of my Mom very hard, to this day. THey were great friends. I know that I have just started that long trip through the 1st year without my Mom (she died on September 6th of this year). I'm not looking forward toward the holidays (Thanksgiving, Christmas et.al.). I'm sure that these joyous holidays will be only a sad reminder for me. I dread them immensely. I'm thankful for my wife and my two children. I know they will help me through all this. I have one happy reminder, my Mom's Shih-Tzu dog named "Sugah" (pronounced as it spells, my folks were from the Boston area where "R's" are not pronounced). "Sugah" is now with us and is a joy to have. Good luck, Jules. We all know that when we leave this life, we'll be together once again with our loved ones. That is one comfort that keeps me going. I know that my folks want me go on and be happy once again. For the sake of my wife and my great children, I'll press on. -Peter
  4. Dear Donna: Please let me offer you my condolences on the loss of your mother. Nothing hurts more than the loss of your parents. I lost my Dad 5 years ago to bone cancer. And lost my Mom six days ago, also due to cancer. Don't let the issues you have with your brother and sister-in-law destroy the memory of the special bonds you had (and still will have) with your Mom. The naysayers will have their time, soon enough. My situation is somewhat similar. I have a brother (out of 4 others) who along with his wife practically ignored my Mom for the past three years thanks mainly to the instigatory practices of his wife. The brother has been totally alienated from the rest of the family, thanks to her. I'm sure that they too will see dollar $igns from my Mom's estate. They treated her shamefully and avowed that "you'll never see your grandchildren again". She never did. Ironically, it was the same brother who was at her bedside when she died last Monday. He will have to live with that fact that he waited until the last two days of her life to come and see her on her deathbed. In my opinion, his forgiveness for the way he treated my Mom over the past few years will have to come from another higher authority, other than me. I was proud and thankful to have my Mom for 45 years and my Dad for 39 years. I know that someday, we'll all be together again. God bless and please keep those bonds alive between you and your late Mother. Don't let some goldigger destroy that special gift you had with your precious Mom.. -Peter
  5. I lost my Mom just after midnight, Monday, September 6, 2004. I am 44 years old, and I feel like a motherless child. In fact, I am. My Mom (and my late father) were always there ready and willing to help me and my family at anytime. I lost my Dad on April 29th, 1999 @ 7:42 PM. It took me nearly three years to get over the loss of my Dad. He was strong, vibrant and really was the best father I ever could have had. Bone Cancer took him away from us. It was horrible and he suffered so much. I was with him (as well as my Mom, her sister, her brother in-law and my second oldest brother) at the TCU floor at the moment he passed away. I was so thankful that I helped him get through it all and helped him make it over the threshold. My Mom lived over 5 years after my Dad's death. In that time, we became so close. I truly enjoyed every moment with her. She moved to a townhouse, less than 1 mile away from my home. My wife and I loved helping her with the groceries, the doctors, just everyday things became so special. My wife and her became the best of friends. My Mom, like my Dad, was a smoker. And like my Dad, smoking was a major cause of her death. She was 75 years old. Had she not continued to smoke, she could have lived many more years. Her health deteriorated over the past 6 months, however, she did her best to conceal it. She always complained about "a bug that was going around". We kept on telling her "PLEASE, go to the doctor!". But she persisted and said that she felt better. However, early August, she had problems with her breathing. She finally listened to me on August 12th when I said "Ma, it's time to go to the doctor". My wife immediately took her to her doctor, who in turn, sent her right to the hospital. At first, they were talking about lymphoma (very treatable). However, it was carcinoma. A mass was found in her chest. They tried radiation therapy. They thought maybe she could at least had a few months. Within 5 days, her condition worsened. The radiation had burned her windpipe (a risk due to the location of the cancer). Her appetite dwindled to nothing. She was ready to "go home" to Dad. My Dad, who's birthday was September 7th got the best birthday present anyone could ask for. I know now that my Mom and Dad are together once again in heaven. We put her to rest yesterday, September 10th, 2004 right next to the man she loved for over 50 years. Her suffering is over. Sadly though, I feel so lost without both my Mom and Dad. My wife and I both feel the same "void" in our lives without my Mom. It really hurts. I'm so thankful that I had such loving and giving parents. I could have not asked for any better parents. I'm going to miss them, truly. I love you Ma and Dad. Peter
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