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Den's Gail

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Everything posted by Den's Gail

  1. Hi George, I rarely come on here anymore, I’m 11-1/2 years out, but I was reading your post in an email and it hit home. I’m very sorry for your loss. I kept my husband’s name on our checks and just put the account in my social security number. The bank told me it was fine to do that. Some utility bills are still in his name too. You mentioned her toothbrush above too. Dennis used to brush his teeth in the shower and I still have his toothbrush there next to my shampoo. I have a bottle of his mouthwash in the closet too, I’m just seriously thinking about giving away his clothes and keeping samples of each type and giving a half of a closet to it. I’m still just talking and thinking about it though, but before I couldn’t even think about it without really becoming upset. It still seems so difficult to do and yet, I have moved on and have created a nice life for myself. I belong to a number of groups, volunteer for a couple of places and have made a lot of friends through these things and am happy. We lost two children prior to his loss and I still have some things of theirs around too, and even our dog’s things we had for over 19 years. He understood it so I know he’d understand me having difficulty parting with his things. They all just make me feel good. I really don’t think about it much, but the thought of none of those things being here really upsets me. I’m very secure in who I am and really believe there is no right or wrong way to grieve, whatever makes us each happy is what’s important. I think some of the best advice I got was to be kind to myself. Be kind to yourself and do what makes you feel good, not what others think you should do. All of my best to you. Gail
  2. Anything! Aren't you glad you know that now! It's really funny, I've been saying it for years and someone will say it that I didn't even remember saying it to. Once you know it, you don't forget it.
  3. It's the golden rule for cookies too. Broken cookies don't have calories. Love, Gail
  4. I guess you don't know, broken pieces don't have calories! Love, Gail
  5. http://www.classicstart8.com I don't post much but I follow your lives daily and you all inspire me. My sister repairs computers and I asked her about Windows 8 and she said all you have to do is download a classic start program. I've included a free link but she said there are others too. Love, Gail
  6. Dear Deb, My heart and prayers are with you, I think of you so often. I thought we were way too young, I didn't realize you were even younger. Love, Gail
  7. Dave, I am SO sorry this has happened to you. We were broken into when our terminally ill daughter was alive and I felt so violated. I couldn't have understood that without having gone through it. It happened in 1982 but I still look at the door every time I come home. I hope they'll be able to recover your things. I can't imagine losing those things too, it's like losing him all over again. My heart and prayers are with you... Hugs, Gail
  8. Hi Lina, I haven't posted in quite some time but I've been reading almost all of the posts every day. First, please let me say how sorry I am for your loss. I want to tell you that I have allergies and have been on allergy shots for 34 years now. I was allergic to our daughter's guinea pigs but they were even able to put them in my shots so hopefully they'll be able to do something for your daughter also. I know how difficult it would be to have to give up your pets too. Our dog was truly another family member to us. He was a poodle though and I wasn't allergic to him. Keeping you in my prayers... Gail
  9. Mary, Those are the words that keep playing over and over again in my head too... Gail
  10. I know you'll all identify with this. I just found this website recently and this came in my daily email today... http://www.godvine.c...ed-One-534.html Love, Gail
  11. I know you'll all identify with this. I just found this website recently and this came in my daily email today... http://www.godvine.com/Homesick-by-Mercy-Me-a-Song-For-Anyone-Who-Has-Lost-a-Loved-One-534.html Love, Gail
  12. We were supposed to get 6" of wet snow and only got one. My neighbor plows my driveway for me but only a straight shot so I usually have to shovel by one side of the garage which is a fairly large area and the stairs, etc. It's going to be 43 degrees by Sunday though so I'm not even going to do that this time. I've been starting to sleep off and on now too, still broken and not every night, but it's a start. Love, Gail
  13. I found the website www.godvine.com today and after watching numerous heartwarming videos, I subscribed to their daily emails.
  14. Please let me add my birthday wishes to you also. I hope you had a wonderful day! Love, Gail
  15. Hi Deb, I completely understand even though it was only four years for me on the 8th of this month. It's still a day at a time but I've learned that it's good that way. We can't go back and we don't even know if we'll have tomorrow. I've come to believe that everything that happens is meant to be, the good and the bad, and that everything is a lesson or a test and it's been helping me. It's definitely not the same, but we are doing it, like it or not. I think Larry and Dennis would really be very proud of us. Love, Gail
  16. Thank you Marty, I signed up to listen in also. I hope I'll be able to hear without a headset, we'll see. Gail
  17. Dear Mary, That is just beautiful. Thank you so much for sharing it with all of us. I still have all of his clothes in his drawers and closets and pictures on the refrigerator too. So many things here he made and all of the cards and notes, everything is still here. And we always held hands, always. Our daughter's friends commented on it, even said wish their husbands did it. Forty three years together and it was still amazing. What I keep seeing in these posts is that we all had amazing relationships in a world where so many don't. It's hard for me to understand why ours had to end, but I know we're not supposed to make sense out of it in our life time, just have faith and trust. It's almost four years for me, coming up at Nov. 8th and in some ways I still haven't faced it. Yes,I know he's not coming back but I have to push him away because otherwise the pain is just still too unbearable. He's always here but when I really start to see him or look at his picture, I literally have to look away because it's still too hard for me to think of him disappearing into thin air. I don't quite understand it myself, it just is. I can so relate to robbing me of breath and stopping my heart. You can only understand it if you experience it. Again, thank you. Gail
  18. I think it sounds good also Marty. It may differ some for those of us with the loss of a spouse though because of the responsibilities we need to do on our own versus other losses. What do you think? Do you think others would mind reading about those things? Gail
  19. Hi Deborah, I'm glad you were able to get on the computer to give us an update. Water seeping under your floor doesn't sound like a good thing, I hope it won't be a difficult repair. You're all still in my prayers. I haven't seen anything from some of the others for awhile either, hopefully they're just without power. Love, Gail
  20. We haven't had any updates from anyone, I pray they just have their computers off riding it out. I always shut mine down when the weather is bad in fear of it being hit even though I have a surge protector. It seems like we never just get rain anymore either, it's always dangerous warnings. Love, Gail
  21. I realize now that when I replied to Deborah I only wrote to her. I want you all to know that you will be in my thoughts and prayers through this very frightening time. When things were bad where I am and I was crouching in my stairway, I just kept praying and praying and I still do whenever we have storms. I pray God will keep you all safe and sound through this. Love, Gail
  22. Dear Deborah, You are in my thoughts and prayers. This is so hard to go through these things even if we had our spouses, yet alone on our own. Love, Gail
  23. Dear Marty, I am so sorry for your loss of Beringer. You are in my heart and prayers as you are going through this very difficult time. I know full well the terrible loss because our Toby was also family to us and we were devastated when we lost him and were still grieving him two years later when Dennis died. I'd like to think through our connections that all of "our family" is now together because of us. http://www.gratefuln...cfm?l=eng&gi=BT I lit a candle for Beringer at www.gratefulness.org and started a new group for him if anyone else would like to light one also under "BT" for "Beringer Tousley." Love, Gail
  24. Thanks Marty, I've been reading them and crying tears I need to get out. Love, Gail
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