I lost my baby Shadow on Jan 28, 2005. He was 14. He was in so much pain that from arthritis that I had to take him to the vets and put to sleep. I'm afraid that he will never forgive me for ending his life. And then I think about him dying in my arms. A part of me also died. I just want to hold him and cuddle him. I miss him so much it kills me. I cry all day long and all night long. I loved him dearly. I saw a husky in someone's yard and I almost got out of my car just to hug him, but then I realized it wasn't my Shadow. I'm sorry to go on and on. I see so many other posts about loved ones that I feel quilty. Anyone who reads this my heart goes out to you on your loss. I can't even go out into my yard anymore. I remember that he would lay there in the hot summer and nap all day, and walk all through my flowers and squash them. but I would still go over and hug him even with flower petals in his mouth. When it was really hot I would get his little pool out and fill it with water. He loved to splash around. Winter was his favorite time though. In Seattle we don't get much snow but when we did he loved it. We would play for hours in it. I know someday I will see him again, but how do I get through the days until that time comes... It seems impossible.
