phyllis

Thanks, Marty. Your words were very helpful. Like my father, I have also had dreams about my mom. The first few were very frightening, but the most recent was very comforting. She hugged me in my dream and told me that it was hard for her, too. I asked her not to leave and she said that she had to. Like the kiss from her in my dad's dream, I could still feel her hug after I woke up. It was a very comforting experience. Phyllis

On May 13th, my precious mother died from a reaction to heparin five days following bypass surgery. As sad as it has been for me, my father is just completely devasted. In July, they would have been married 55 years, and he loved only her for the 61 years that they knew one another. He is in good health, but I am worried about him, emotionally. Before my mom died, I had never seen him cry. He was taught to hold in emotions, but now everytime I see him, he breaks down. It tears my heart out to see him in such pain. I know that this is part of the process, that there's no way around the hurt, but I have always been the kind of person who wants to "fix" everything, to make it ok again. When he's alone or out walking, he talks to her and a couple of days ago, he said he heard her call his name. He said it was so clear that he actually went downstairs to look for her. Yesterday he told me that just before he woke up, she came to him and kissed him. He said that it was so real that he still felt the pressure of her lips after he woke. If any of you have ever had experiences like this, I would love to hear about it, or if you just have some advice, I would be grateful. Thanks