I have been reading this board for a few weeks, just had not gotten up the courage to register until now. Part of me doesn't want to face this, the other part knows I have to. My name is Leah and I am 46 years old. On May 25th Jerry and a friend went for a Motorcycle ride, a few hours later I got the phone call, there has been an accident. When I got to the hospital they told me that Jerry didn't make it. Jerry was 47. We had been married 17 years. I feel at a complete loss, he was my other half.... I have two kids from a previous marriage who Jerry raised as his own. He was never able to have children, so mine became his and our 4 grandchildren were the light in his life. Most days I walk that thin line between feeling as though this is just a dream and I will wake up and he will be here and feeling as if I am in a nightmare and praying someone wakes me up. Does that make sense? I went back too work and am "functioning" I am trying to figure out how to pay bills etc on one income instead of two. Trying to make it through each lonely night.....just trying to remember to breathe. I bought the book I wasn't ready to say goodbye and found this board, which I am so thankful is here. Hugs to all. Leah