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Found 6 results

  1. Jelo

    Help me, I’m broken!

    My baby of 8 yrs whom We spolied and loved more than ourselves was attacked & killed by another dog while boarding in a kennel facility while me & hubby were on vacation.We have no kids and he is our life!There is a huge guilt on our part.What if we didn’t leave him, what if we didn’t go on vacation, all sorts of “what if.”We’re so broken that we both can’t sleep sincecwe found out (12.22.18).We cry ourselves to sleep & wake up crying.We skipped the Christmas celebratiom as we’re both on bed and miserable.I myself can’t & won’t do anything.We haven’t gone back to work.I’ve been so depressed & can’t forgive myself!I’m still grieving for the death of my dear dad in Aug.And now this.. I can’t handle all the pain!So much emotions overwhelmed me.I don’t want to leave my bed as I can’t stand seeing the rest of the house especially our family room where he stayed for 8 yrs.We have our daily routine that haunts me every second.Please I need advice & help! Thanks!
  2. prayingmantislover28

    A cross for my cat.

    My cat left this world march 1st, 2017, he had a sudden heart attack. He was a very lovable cat, and I miss him dearly. My dad made the cross and nailed it together, I wrote the poem. And drew the picture.
  3. I recently lost my mom 4 months ago. One of my dogs, Shiloh, a rescue hound mix has really been troubled because of this. She had seen her body the day of. In all our panic when I was on the phone with 911, she came in while she was on the ground during CPR. She had her tail wagging, and was interested in what was going on and looked at me. Playtime right now? She looked at my mom and instantly her whole body language and face expression changed. Her tail drooped, her eyes became sad and hurt. I've never seen her so heartbroken. It's an expression that has stayed with me. I gently led her out of the room and she followed me to the kennel. She understood the whole situation, from what I could tell. The paramedics, she did not bark or try to bother them when I took her out for a potty break. My other dog has no understanding really of what has been going on. She was depressed at first, not eating her favorite treats, eating but un-enthusiastically, not as excited to she her favorite people. She was always largely treat motivated. After about a week of that, that seemed to get better. At some point she started having nightmares. This is fairly frequent. After about a month or two after mom, my dad rearranged the bedroom. Suddenly in the middle of the night she would go and pee in there. We never had that issue before. She was pee pad trained at first, so we always have pee pads in the bathroom. She ALWAYS peed on the pee pads in the bathroom if she needed to go. If her favorite pee pad was used, she would go on the floor in the bathroom. Never on the carpets except maybe once or twice when she was much younger. She would normally wake one of us up if she needed to go desperately in the night. Instead she was peeing in the middle of the floor. My dad caught her, because we had multiple pets and wasn't sure which one had done it. We were almost positive it wasn't her though, because how good she was with the pee pads, and she loves using any excuse to go outside and get a treat. We had to use all kinds of stuff on the carpets, take her out in the middle of the night, keep my dad's door shut in the middle of the night, and re-do "umbilical cord training" and kenneling at night to reteach her. That all stopped her and haven't had that issue since. Other rooms in the house have been rearranged since and before and she did not respond that way so I'm sure it was the stress of losing mom. The nightmares are still happening. I wake her up when she has one and love on her because I can't stand to hear her cry and use her scared/fear whines. She had nightmares before but not as often. I feel like she's dreaming about mom or the day of. Mom was the one who adopted her with my dad, but she became primarily my dog because I trained her, took care of her daily needs, and she warmed up to me the most. Shiloh has always been an anxious dog, we had always thought maybe she had been abused or something similar like this happened to her. She's very stubborn and in some ways has become more loving, in others more stubborn. She seems to act out a lot more with barking at the children from the fence (the backyard neighbors have a daycare). One corner of the fence is wood. Just the standard chain link. The kids wander over if the care takers aren't paying attention (or even if they are), and she jumps on the fence and barks. She has a large scary bark, and is large enough she can stand on the fence (and hop it if she wants), but so far has never hopped that corner of the fence. I don't think she'll hurt the kids but it sure freaks them (and me) out. Shiloh misses her a lot, my mom didn't leave the house much so I think she got used to her always being here. Thankfully, there is almost always someone home still. I think she is struggling with it all and I don't know how else to help her? I grieve with her every now and then by having a picture of her and crying with it and talking to her. I think it helps, because when my family grieves around me it helps me. Or am I just stressing her out more by doing so? I feel like you would include a human or a child in the grieving and animals are very similar in most emotional aspects. Any tips to help her out from anyone who has had a grieving pet?
  4. To our best boy, our Chappie boy , our best friend forever, 01/7/2002 - 12/20/2015. Our way home, our path to a better life. You gave us the best 13 years we ever had. You were our best boy, we miss you so much, we hurt every second, and we want you back so so bad. We are so sorry you had to go this way. We feel so sorry you had to feel any pain. we cried behind your back so you would not be stressed because we knew how much you didn’t like us to be sad until the end was near we could not hold back our tears and we cried with you in our arms, we felt so bad as you got sick we didn’t want you in anymore pain, you got so sick so fast we tried to take your sickness away by taking you to the doctors and even tried different ones, we finely found a vet that promised us some hope. You did so good after your operation , we thought you was free of the cancer , after your operation you did so well everyone even the surgeon was so shocked you were so perky you were running again walking and eating back to your young self, it was the best week we had for that year. we found your cancer was so ruff we did everything we could to help you dear boy our best friend we cried during your surgery we prayed asking for you to come back to us safe and sound to your home you came and incredibly you were back on your paws you were so good we brought you to your favorite places and we shared a few good days we thought it was gone the horrible tumor was gone for good , the morning we saw that lump come back we took you right back to the vet they did another test and the test was 2 cancers in one we almost died we was so sad so shocked it was coming back again and fast it was two types of cancer in one spot, it was so fast boy I’m so sorry we tried everything to slow it down but it was coming back to take you away, you lost so much weight and would not eat we fed you with a syringe and wet your lips when you were so thirsty we got you the best organic foods that you loved Beef Bison salmon and pork chops , so sorry to take away the carrots and sweets for we were trying to starve the cancer of sugars . we got you everything we could we did all we could to make you cozy and full, we held you in my arms for 3 weeks as the cancer got worse, watching you throw up was heart breaking we know you were so thirsty and it was so hard not to see your thirst go away daddy packed your dressing with Manuka honey and essential oils to try to soften your area so you could poo and fight infection , We soaked you in the tub only to sooth your ulcerated wound, we took you to the doc as much as you hated them they all realy loved you tried their best to Help us , we got you the top supplements to boost your body and fight the cancer toward the end you could not drink your water and hold it down you didn’t want to eat anymore you were so sick boy your poor eyes were starting to sink in, we were your helpers your nurses you parents your companions we helped you as much as we could, Daddy and mommy went above and beyond to make you better but the cancer was too much it spread so fast without us seeing it was already there destroying your insides, when we first noticed something was wrong we took you to the doc a number of times but they said they couldn’t help you anymore . at the end we was so upset we did not sleep for 3 nights as we took turns holding you in our arms and sleeping by your side. when we got up you would cry for your mommy and daddy to come back and we would run back to you boy . For we will remember your first bark when you was only 4 months old and last howl at 13 years, whenever Daddy was away at work mommy was there for you daddy had to work and he would feel your pain when working he would sometimes break down and cry at work. We knew it was very bad when we felt the hunger in your belly but would not eat and could hear you breathing funny in your sleep. We didn’t want to throw in the towel we wanted to fight it more but we couldn’t bear to see you in any more distress and pain. Toward the end your bum was so ulcerated and so painful we couldn’t let you go on any more. We didn’t want to see you go I held the phone in my hands for three nights finding it too hard to make the call. we just couldn’t see you like that anymore after all the years of our going for walks and going for rides to the park going fishing and camping playing ball, you walking with your skunk toy and fox tail, every day daddy came home from work we really di love you greeting me at the door to take my hat , this year we will really miss you pulling the Christmas tree down the trail with Sukie beagle we will have to take your place for we don’t know if she will pull it without you there . We went for a walk and she smells you’re sent and looks all around we think she thinks you ran away and will be back she looks to your bed every night to see if you are back. All the good days we had together. You really were our best of boy. We couldn’t bring you to a place to let you go so we called a nice doctor who come to the house with here bag of things to take the pain away, she insured you would pass with no more pain, daddy held your head to my head like we would do before bed and every morning before we left for work, mommy held your hand and Andrew rest his head on your back we felt your last breath as your drifted to the other side to the end we always said we would be there with you till the very end the end was here end we love you we had to stick to it and we did , it was by far the hardest thing we ever did but we knew we had to be there till the end it’s what we promised you your whole life I’m so sorry the end was now, we always just thought one day you would pass in your sleep and old happy dog we really didn’t want you to suffer from sickness daddy and mommy always love you we have taking your pain away now and put it right into us . My eyes bleed like never before you were our love our past and present you are always with us we will never forget you , my only wish is to see you one day when we pass to play tug and sniff in the woods together, i ask you to make us a place there where you are we will see you again , we hope you found your way we hope you found your friend bun buns were sorry about her to, she was your friend we knew when she passed you missed her dearly we are gathering all your pictures I’m putting them all together so we can see you all the time , suki beagle your companion is still at the fridge barking for food she thinks you are in the woods she goes in the yard and watches the woods for you she is confused for now she misses you and we will take care of her just like you I’m sure she will be there with you soon for she cannot stop eating. we will never forget the day we took you home , you were the most hansom beagle you walked like a show dog you were so tiny with your dome head that bumped the coffee table , we lived in a small apartment that would not take dogs when you learned about your bark we could not hide you there anymore , we would take you in and out hiding you in a back pack till you grew out of that , we finally moved , boy it was you that helped us move on to a new place away from the city , a place so peaceful we enjoyed you every moment , we will miss you till the day come that we can be together again, we will walk together and you will show us your new home . You were and always are my best friend best companion. Our best boy, Buddy Chappie Beagle. You rest easy, You will be greatly missed love always, Mommie, Daddy, Andrew and sukie .
  5. kacyg

    Heartbroken Over Charlie

    2 years ago,for valentines day,me and my husband decided to add a dog to our family.Its been just the 2 of us for almost a decade!!We got a cute little pomeranion mix and we named him Charlie bear.About a year after getting him,we had our 1st baby.They became best friends and very protective over each other.We did everything together and even took him with us for vacations.We treated him like he was our son and even after having a baby nothing changed.We still loved him the same. 3 days ago I let charlie outside to play while my husband was out there.Somehow,charlie crossed the street when my husband wasnt looking and when my husband started yelling his name he ran across the street to get back home to us and a truck hit him.The sight of charlie lying there in the road stiff and no longer alive is something I hope to never experience again. He was just trying to get home.He was such a loyal happy and protective member of our family.He would do anything for the 3 of us,so for us to have let this happen to him breaks my heart. Not only were we negligent, but now our daughter is just heartbroken and lonely looking everywhere for her little buddy.Im so sad about it,we lost our little fur baby,a member of our family ...and it really opened my eyes to how life can change in literally the blink of an eye. My house is so quiet and lonely,his toys all over the house.But he no longer greets us at the door when we get home,or follows us around.Even the neighborhood dogs knew,they barked all night the night charlie passed away.I really loved him so much.Driving down the road you can still see his blood,it rips my heart apart to see that.I feel so guilty and can only hope he forgives us and knew how loved he was!
  6. To everyone that has lost a beloved pet, I am sorry. To everyone experiencing this grief during the holiday season and/or another special occasion, I am sorry. It is tremendous to get through such thoughts and emotions and move forward. Never did I appreciate this before losing Sir Greysby to pancreatitis on November 25th, 2014 after a 30-day fight wherein he tried to live and my husband and I tried to help him win the battle. Never have I gone through such - let alone his passing 2 days before hosting Thanksgiving at my house, which I did do in an almost an out-of-body manner and excusing myself to go cry silent away from the guests. 3 weeks and 2 days later, I am healing, but have moments wherein I feel sucker-punched in my gut once more and I let-out primordial cries of anguish. Why? What could I have done differently? Why didn't I recognize the 2 earliest behavioral changes in him as signs he was becoming ill? Would those 4-5 weeks have made a difference in his ability to recover before I took him to the Vet? What have I done to work through and move past such grief? I downloaded 4 e-books to read on pets going to heaven and the grieving process. I learned that my grief and guilt are very "normal," although I have felt anything but normal. I created a beautiful photo journal book of him - from the days he was a stray and we took him in and up through the day of his departure from this life. I kept a swatch of his hair and his foot-print and his collar with the heart-shaped tags. His remains were cremated and placed in a nice oak urn that displays a picture of him making "soft eyes" at me on his last day here. I have gone to a Christian psychologist twice to help me process the void. The void is not as huge now, but the first week after he left, my stomach hurt, I cried a lot, and I did not know what to do with the spare time that Sir Greysby use to fill-up when he was well, but especially during the last week of his life. I had gone into a panic mode in trying to get him to eat all forms of chicken and/or treats ... anything! I woke-up in the middle of many nights wondering if he had passed away and got up to check on him. When he lapped his ice-cold water, I was so thankful and hopeful. But then, the battle ended. My momentum was still going forward and wanting to help him, but he was no longer here. I've played back the video, from the last morning of his being with me, several times. He loved my ankles and feet, then sat in front of his food without touching it once again ... after 3-days of his not doing so. He had come full circle. This is what had caused me to take him to the Vet to begin with ... he did not eat his favorite warmed, soft cat food for 3-days. The Vet placed him on steroids and an antibiotic, and for several weeks, it seemed he might have a fighting chance. Sir Greysby never resumed eating his food at the level he had done before falling ill, but at least he nibbled. The fact was that he was anorexic and continued to lose weight during those last 30-days of his life. 3-days before his departure, my husband and I decorated the living-room for the holiday season. Our minds told us that he would not make it, but our hearts hoped he would. We played Christmas carols for him, took a photo of him, and struggled with thinking it might be his last holiday season with us. Barely have I been able to hear any Christmas music since then. However, I do not regret giving Sir Greysby one-last Christmas with us, and I know that with time, I will smile and feel good about those memories. My other cats and their adjusting to his not being here has been awkward. The routines changed for them, too. Sir Greysby ruled our home during his 2-1/2 year stay with us. :-) However, I am adapting to their new routines and am spending more time loving and appreciating them. They have had numerous pictures taken of them in their favorite areas of the house, at play and at rest. Now, I fully comprehend they are my family that love me unconditionally. There are "those" people who are thoughtless for whatever reasons. I have chosen not to be rude to them in return, but rather to ignore them and move through my grieving process as I see fit. I know that one-day I will feel better. It is a process and a journey. I will always thank my God of understanding for allowing this beautiful soul to grace our home with the last 2-1/2 years of his life. We learned so much from him and I know that Sir Greysby is in a much better, heavenly place that affords him happiness and peace. May your soul find peace and comfort during this time and know that this lady is praying for your wellness and healing, too.
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