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Has anyone had anything 'strange' happen in your house since your spouse passed?


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Tom, we're thinking of you...whispered a prayer.  I know it's a hard day to get through, I hope you're able to get through it okay.

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Tom, I am probably the only person alive that gets terribly angry with numbers.  Still, sometimes I am an island all to myself.  Thinking of you on this date and on October 17th, I will remember numbers again.  I wish it got easier.  Maybe being older, like me, your mind filters out some things, or simply does not try to comprehend.  

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Dear virtual friends, thanks so much. It's a beautiful day in Boston and I went with a friend to a spot on the Charles river where we would do the crossword on a nice day that we weren't sailing. I have young Susan's shell collection and we each threw a shell in the river. Lots of support & tears. Nice day has me thinking of the second sailing season without my perfect sailing partner.

Amaryllis is beginning to fade. So it flowered, unexpectedly, and lasted in best condition to EXACTLY  3/31. Even this skeptic can't see that as random. Thanks for smiling at me with those blossoms my love.

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4 hours ago, TomPB said:

Dear virtual friends, thanks so much. It's a beautiful day in Boston and I went with a friend to a spot on the Charles river where we would do the crossword on a nice day that we weren't sailing. I have young Susan's shell collection and we each threw a shell in the river. Lots of support & tears. Nice day has me thinking of the second sailing season without my perfect sailing partner.

Amaryllis is beginning to fade. So it flowered, unexpectedly, and lasted in best condition to EXACTLY  3/31. Even this skeptic can't see that as random. Thanks for smiling at me with those blossoms my love.

Dear Tom!

May God bless you on this day and fill you with the most beautiful memories of your beloved Susan.

Hugs from Janka

Butterfly.gif.21cdf2161bbc13070ccba198e4e45ae8.gif

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  • 3 weeks later...

Hello All

Today is my beloved Rick's birthday- he would have been 65.  I had some wonderful, blessed events happen last night and this morning. I took the day off from work because I'm too emotional to do anything away from our home. I've posted before about the MiniCooper's radio giving me messages- it happened again twice last week.

I leave the radio on for the dogs while I'm at work. My mom was a bit of a 'cougar'- her long-time sig. other, Tom, was 20 years her junior, and HER song was Rod Stewart's Maggie May.

Rick and I had an artisan jam and marmalade business. When he went to get the personalized plates for the van, he wanted Jammin, but that taken, so he settled on Marmvan.  Our theme song was Eddie Grant's 'We Jammin, I'd love to be jammin with you'.........Guess what song was playing the second I walked in the door last night? WE Jammin, followed by Maggie May!!! So  both my mom and Rick  are hanging out together! Then my sister called last night about 8. I hung up, put the phone of the coffee table and went into the kitchen to feed the dogs. The phone then rang as the intercom......totally different ring tone and tempo. The other handset for the intercom is down in the guest house! Guess Who!!! Then this morning when getting up ( I still sleep on the couch) I looked at the TV/Sat remote on the coffee table, and it's all lit up! The buttons only light up when you touch it!  All this on the eve of and on his birthday! I feel truly blessed to have been given these messages. I know I'll be devastated if they stop, but for now, I am truly grateful.  Happy Birthday, my honey- you were, and always will be, the best thing that ever happened to me! I love you!

Peace to All

Steph

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I've had my fair share of unexplainable things happen that I've documented over the years since Tammy died. Things that defy logic. From the ceiling fan that Tammy loved that turned itself on to falling asleep on the highway at 70mph going to Tammy's funeral and somehow avoiding death and damage. The bond Tammy and I shared in life was strong, so strong that I believe it's for all eternity.

Last night something happened and I know it was Tammy. I was watching TV in bed, and I keep my cellphone in bed on Tammy's side. Out of the corner of my eye I saw a glimmer of light from the underside of my phone that caught my eye. Now, keep in mind my phone is far away on the edge of the bed, out of my reach without me stetching to get it. And I was lying there arms at my side relaxed. The reason I bring this up is that my phone turned on it's flashlight on it's own. Keep in mind to turn on the flashlight you need to pull down a screen and press a button. It was Tammy for sure and she was trying to get my attention and let me know she's still here.

And that is both comforting and frustrating. Frustrating in the sense that I don't know how to communicate with her. Sure, I talk to her but I don't know if she hears me. I reach out to touch her side of the bed in hopes she feels it. Maybe on the surface this sounds like some form of insanity but too many things have happened to not conclude that Tammy is with me, loving me and letting me know she will always be my girl and always be with me.

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Mitch, 

That is very special because I understand it's hard for them to do physical things without physical bodies, but take it on faith that she does hear you and keep talking to her.  I have always talked to George...I'm glad I live alone or they might have hauled me away a long time ago!

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My cousin spoke of his and my aunt talking to her deceased husband while she mowed her yard.  She was in her 90's then, so the fact that she was mowing, to me, was wonderful, and her talking to my deceased uncle, to me seemed normal.  Now that Billy is gone, I think it even more than normal, it is some touch with him, even if it might be one sided it seems, who is to say?  When we pray, we expect to be heard.  Yet, my friend told me when I asked her if she talked to her husband, she said "your still young in your grief."  I will always talk to Billy, and I certainly hope I will always pray too.  

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I posted this before, Marg your comments brought it back...so true    

Is Nothing At All

By Henry Scott-Holland

Death is nothing at all.
It does not count.
I have only slipped away into the next room.
Nothing has happened.

Everything remains exactly as it was.
I am I, and you are you,
and the old life that we lived so fondly together is untouched, unchanged.
Whatever we were to each other, that we are still.

Call me by the old familiar name.
Speak of me in the easy way which you always used.
Put no difference into your tone.
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow.

Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes that we enjoyed together.
Play, smile, think of me, pray for me.
Let my name be ever the household word that it always was.
Let it be spoken without an effort, without the ghost of a shadow upon it.

Life means all that it ever meant.
It is the same as it ever was.
There is absolute and unbroken continuity.
What is this death but a negligible accident?

Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight?
I am but waiting for you, for an interval,
somewhere very near,
just round the corner.

All is well.
Nothing is hurt; nothing is lost.
One brief moment and all will be as it was before.
How we shall laugh at the trouble of parting when we meet again!

more Henry Scott-Holland

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Source: https://www.familyfriendpoems.com/poem/death-is-nothing-at-all-by-henry-scott-holland

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Gin, I think there is such a void that we know cannot be filled.  As I said, I hate numbers, but last year I did not "see" the flowers, I did not see the spring, this year I saw it so I will have to say that is a change for me.  Maybe my moving back to our home state made a difference to me.  I do not have any answers that would help anyone else.  Maybe having people depend on me makes me worry more about other things.  I know Billy is not coming back, but I talk to him.  I do a lot of praying too.  Billy does not answer me, but I hope my prayers are heard.  I still cry.  Tonight I watched Paddington Bear 2 and had to get a new roll of paper towels.  I cry very easily.  I am not young anymore and sometimes I think "well, if I die, I just die."  I am not well, but whatever I have wrong with me cannot be fixed, so as long as I can keep going, I will.  Billy said "the one left must stay."  I will as long as I can.  I try to drop off to sleep as fast as I can, but if I wake at 5:00 a.m., I will worry.  I don't like to worry.  I don't worry about myself though.  

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Kevin,

I love that poem because I believe they still ARE but they've crossed over into another realm.  Perhaps it's out of our grasp, perhaps we do not understand it, but they exist all the same...and so I continue to talk to him, and who know but what he hears me, no one can prove or disprove it either, but that doesn't take anything away from it.  Perhaps it's in having faith in things we cannot explain that is the greatest gift of all!

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On 4/27/2018 at 10:00 AM, kayc said:

Kevin,

I love that poem because I believe they still ARE but they've crossed over into another realm.  Perhaps it's out of our grasp, perhaps we do not understand it, but they exist all the same...and so I continue to talk to him, and who know but what he hears me, no one can prove or disprove it either, but that doesn't take anything away from it.  Perhaps it's in having faith in things we cannot explain that is the greatest gift of all!

I hope that Susan lives on as a spirit, not just in my memory, and is waiting for me. I talk to her and meditate on her. But, sorry, losing her physical presence in my life can't be described as "nothing has happened".

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I agree, Tom.  But I think the poem means nothing has changed as far as our love goes...just hard to keep that in mind though when we don't get an answer back, don't have physical touch, don't see them anymore.

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Hi everyone,

My name is Elizabeth.

I lost my husband, Iver, last month. He was and is the love of my life. I last commented about my loss in the 'going through the motions of being alive' forum.

I'm having an experience in which a sparrow keeps trying to perch on the window in front of me when I'm on the treadmill. This never happened before my husband passed on. I think it's likely that the bird is reacting to the sound of the treadmill, but I want to think that my husband's spirit is guiding the bird.

In the past, I have had visits from loved ones during sleep state: my uncle Tommy and my Mother. 

I know they weren't dreams because they were so real and non-dream-like. My uncle appeared to me looking so unworldly beautiful. He was emanating light from within. His blue eyes were the deepest blue. His hair and skin were shimmering. In our conversation, he said things that would only have been said in real life.  I remember asking him if he was in a good place. He said ''Yes, it's a good place''. I don't think they want to let on how amazing it is in God's light, that we might feel tempted to take the first bus out...-)

My Mother's visit was a phone call. She didn't appear to me. I also asked her how heaven was and she didn't answer me.

If not for those visits, I might have serious doubts about whether there is an afterlife. But they did visit me, and I am very grateful.

 

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Elizabeth, my first time sailing without Susan a beautiful falcon landed on the spreaders as we were motoring to pick up the mooring and stayed there. Never saw that before in 30 years sailing, not even a seagull. Susan always went forward to pick up the mooring line with the boathook while I drove the boat, and I just realized that she was trying to be there and participate in the maneuver she enjoyed, as always. Things that make me think her spirit is really present, beyond being in my memory, make life more bearable.

20170723_164115_zoom.jpg.582510abd8828c995b5a3e7f4fa491a3.jpg

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17 hours ago, TomPB said:

Elizabeth, my first time sailing without Susan a beautiful falcon landed on the spreaders as we were motoring to pick up the mooring and stayed there. Never saw that before in 30 years sailing, not even a seagull. Susan always went forward to pick up the mooring line with the boathook while I drove the boat, and I just realized that she was trying to be there and participate in the maneuver she enjoyed, as always. Things that make me think her spirit is really present, beyond being in my memory, make life more bearable.

20170723_164115_zoom.jpg.582510abd8828c995b5a3e7f4fa491a3.jpg

Tom, I think I would have cried to see that. By everything you wrote, how could it NOT be your Susan?

 

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