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Grieving Girlfriend left me out of the blue


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I'm literally just in a state of shock... Lie to me or not, she said that my presence was still useful for her. Whether or not she had feelings, how could anyone be so rude and have a complete disregard for the well-being of another, let alone someone that was there for her in her darkest hour, when others would not be. The complete lack of respect and civility, I just can't fathom that such a person would exist. She kept repeating that it was over although I made it clear that I had no intention of changing that. I did dodge a bullet there, but its made me lose faith in humanity and in love. 

She once mentioned that her ex told her she belonged in a mental institute, I was quick to shoot that notion down, but maybe he was onto something...

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On 7/11/2018 at 12:58 PM, Trey said:

She texted back that she didn't feel like talking anymore and that I just needed to grow up and talk to someone else. I told her talking to her was a last resort, I had tried talking to everyone, and I wouldnt be doing it if I didnt absolutely need to, that I was just afraid I'd hurt myself. She said she doesn't have time for this and that I was bothering her, and if I kept trying she'd block me. She just said bye and stopped replying after that. How could someone I gave so much to bring themselves to be like that, it doesnt seem human.

 

On 7/11/2018 at 8:26 PM, kayc said:

Wow.  Trey, excuse me if this offends you but I can't help but feel you dodged a bullet here!  How horrible!  I mean to lie to someone about how you feel is inexcusable no matter what void she was trying to fill for herself.  It shows extreme disregard and lack of character and then to blame YOU somehow and say YOU need to grow up?!!  Double-wow.  I am so sorry, I would be so done with her.  You are right, it doesn't seem human.  I can only say, your person is out there somewhere, waiting to meet you and I wish you such a wonderful life with that person...the person who will not fake her feelings or lie to you.  You deserve so much better than that.

Wow. I am so sorry, but at the very least, now you know the truth so there's no more guessing or wondering "what if?" As Kayc said, you dodged a bullet. People are so callous and cruel like its no big deal and it is awful. Hurt people hurt people. She was like this well before her father died, she just disguised it well. Tim did too. This was all on her, and has nothing to do with you or your worth as a person or significant other. She was just looking to fill a void, and I'm sorry you found yourself as the temporary fill. Tim acted very similar towards me in the end, and I wonder sometimes if that's all I ever was to him, so I completely understand the confusion in wondering why she felt the need to lie to you. But again, she made an active choice to lie when you made it clear that your intentions were genuine and that she had no reason to lie to you.

Wash your hands of her and move forward. You don't need or want anyone like this in your life, friend, lover or otherwise. Don't move on or better yourself out of spite or revenge; move on because you deserve better and learn from the lessons that will come from this experience.

--Rae :)

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On 7/12/2018 at 1:55 AM, Trey said:

its made me lose faith in humanity and in love.

Just remind yourself that they're not all the same.  My daughter has been struggling with the same thing as her husband has been unbelievably cruel to her.  My offer to her to pay for a divorce still stands, waiting for her to say the word.  She said every time she feels she can't trust again, she remembers her brother (they DO exist!) who has character, values, and is of the highest integrity.  I hope she has someone like that someday and I hope that for you too!

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15 minutes ago, Rae1991 said:

Hurt people hurt people. She was like this well before her father died, she just disguised it well.

Very true!

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