Gwenivere Posted July 8, 2018 Report Share Posted July 8, 2018 It’s the ARNP that wants to see me in 2 weeks. My doc would if she wasn’t totally booked already. I’m putting together an email to her about involving a 3 person in this. He was nice, but got me in a tailspin about med changes that just add to the stress. I swear, for all the help these med people are supposed to be, they can really mess ya up. That is why I hate having too many of them pointing at another to talk to. My frigging neurologist weighed in on thyroid probs I have when I asked about neurological symptoms. Maybe they are tied together, but I wanted info on an MRI. Just writing this gives me a headache! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted July 9, 2018 Report Share Posted July 9, 2018 I can imagine. Too many cooks in the kitchen sometimes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gwenivere Posted July 10, 2018 Report Share Posted July 10, 2018 I always forget this trigger. Changing our bed. (And it still our bed). Half used and his pillow always pinches at my heart. Used to be a bi weekly thing, but once a month now for the effort on a king size. Plus, what is the point now? One of our dogs still sleeps in the middle as she always did, occasionally on top of his side. I was noticing all the food in the pantry I don’t make anymore as I use the microwave mostly. Rice and pasta mixes that require a pot to make. Can’t donate them as food banks don’t want expired dates, even tho they are still fine. I’ve stopped buying raw meats and fish. I’m like the single guys at the market with frozen dinners or prepared food to be heated. I sure miss real meals. Shopping is no fun anymore. I splurged and bought some cooked ribs, but they won’t be like Steve’s. Just bored with the same stuff over and over. Fuel. It’s also strange that it is summer and it doesn’t matter more than I don’t get rained on. The whole city is in that mode and so much going on. Not that we participated much as we got older, but we did enjoy it. Aside from my clothes it’s no different to me than the winter. I do miss the dog park when I could walk it. Steve would often show up for a little bit and the kids were so happy. I miss the musician buddies that came by and hearing them on the deck jamming. Such little things I took for granted that aren’t really little at all. Fortunately my counselor reminds me of that. I guess my mind tries to downplay them so they don’t hurt so much, but they do. No out running grief. I can’t even count how much luggage it’s moved in here. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brat#2 Posted August 11, 2018 Report Share Posted August 11, 2018 Another "trigger" today, it's Dale's birthday, the 4th one alone. I guess I'm sort of getting use to the triggers or scare tissue is starting to form. The last 3 years I was a total mess today, but this morning I woke up and wished him a Happy Birthday and then thought of his smile as I would hand him his card first thing in the morning and then how we would spend all day deciding where he would want to go to dinner that night. Of course, I have cried on and off so far today in remembering that and thinking of how sad it is that I'm probably the only one who remembers today is his birthday. I love this day, as it was the day he was brought into this world and eventually met me and we fell in love. I do hate that the word trigger has become a constant part of our lives now, every day there is at least one trigger that sets me off, but knowing that you all know that feeling, makes it a little easier. Happy Birthday, my love and as long as I'm alive, I will celebrate you on this day (and everyday) and love you and cherish you. 4 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartyT Posted August 11, 2018 Report Share Posted August 11, 2018 Lovely, Joyce ❤️ Thinking of you today as you remember and celebrate your beloved Dale ❤️ 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KarenK Posted August 11, 2018 Report Share Posted August 11, 2018 Such a beautiful sentiment, Joyce. Peace to you on this day and all that follow. 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gin Posted August 11, 2018 Report Share Posted August 11, 2018 Joyce,. Thinking about you today. I know how hard it is to think that no one else remembers their birthday. It was and is so important to us. 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gwenivere Posted August 11, 2018 Report Share Posted August 11, 2018 Joyce, am so thinking of you today. The triggers never seem to stop and this is a big one. You put it beautifully about how this day they were born and became our world when they grew up. I wish I could hug you for real like we always talk about. Much love to you today as Dale would be so grateful for your birthday so he could fall in love with you. 💖 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted August 12, 2018 Report Share Posted August 12, 2018 Joyce, that's beautiful. I never did figure out how to do George's birthday, death day, our anniversary. The quote/card you posted is beautiful. I think next time I go through one of those special days I will look for one that says what I want to say. Thinking of you today as you go through this day with him ever keenly on your heart...wishing you could be together to celebrate his day. 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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