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Gin, I took a medication different the other night and it made my head swim, and for no other reason than the fact I am 76, I could not tell if my heart was beating faster or too slow, and kept thinking "I'm 76, I feel different, I know it ruptured my colon again, I cannot take my regular medications, I will die, I am 76," and kept my anxiety up till 6:00 a.m.  I won't take a different medication again.  Not unless they prove it is my heart.  Then I will walk down that path.  I have had five years since the colon rupture with overall sepsis.  Billy got me through the initial year, then he left me.  I felt bad because my granddaughter kept coming in checking on me.  I cannot take anything for pain but Tylenol.  Cannot take aspirin, ibuprofen, or any other OTC pills.  I do not want any of them having to take care of me so this regimen I am on I hope will keep working.  I will not eat chocolate, any kind of nuts, no raw veggies, nothing made with corn, no salads.  I won't get off the tracks unless I have to. What we are telling ourselves everything is our age.  And it is.  But, before your mate left, were you old?  Neither was I.  I hope we can keep on aging until we can't.  I understand.  

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Oh Marg, I'll add you to my prayers, you can't go, you have your granddaughter to live for, I'm glad you're doing what you can for yourself, it's all any of us can do.  I wrote about my scare in the other thread so won't repeat it here, but it seems many of us are dealing with the growing old alone thing, they had us, now we're going through it all alone, very different!

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10 hours ago, Gin said:

hi Karen,

I am coming along very slowly.  Lots of pain with incision and left arm and shoulder.  I hope to see my primary tomorrow to see what he thinks.  I am sure that my age is not helping the healing.  Will let you know what he says.  Thanks for checking.

gin

Gin I certainly hope you heal without issues and all is progressing normally...we'll look for your update after you see the doctor.  (((hugs)))

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Doc said the pain should gradually decrease.  It was a very long walk to his office.  Hate doing these things without Al.  Now doc wants me to see regular cardiologist and pacemaker doc.

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I'm sorry you're in so much pain, Gin. My mom got a pacemaker and it helped her greatly, gave her more energy too.  I know, it's so hard to go through these challenges without the comfort and care of our husbands.  (((hugs)))

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