Month this Friday since mom passed it’s not getting any better

[Ejanine]

Just wanting to know if there is a heaven out there. Just can’t deal with my mom gone, I posted before I received great advice that did help a little but when u wake up without your best friend/ mom knowing u will never see her again is tough, just can’t do it no more, just want to know there is a heaven and that I will see her when I go. I’m very alone down here, I was also my moms caretaker full time she passed on my watch, now not one family member speaks to me, I try to explain I tried real hard to keep her healthy and alive I was in the process of giving her my kidney, we were just waiting for a donor heart. Can’t get image of finding her gone in bed from mind, I checked on her often to make sure she was ok in not in a lot of pain like she usually is but then I fell asleep two hours later she was gone.. I’m so sorry for that, wish I could turn back time and change things.. but I just can’t live without her anymore just hurts too much... just writing this message cause I have no one else to send one to. I just hope she forgives me I wish like hell I didn’t fall asleep she could’ve been calling me and I’m just laying there sleep.. Sorry mom.

[kayc]

I definitely believe there is!  This is an individual thing, whether people choose to believe in afterlife or not, but I've experienced NDE twice and have read accounts of others and it's uncannily similar!  Yes, you are right, I think it IS harder for those who believe life is up and that's it, whereas at least I have hope and that makes all the difference to me.  

There is so much we don't know about afterlife...we know they've left their physical body...in my Christian faith they teach we'll get a new body someday, meanwhile their spirit continues to live on, right now they're in a different form and place.  Many believe they are able to hear us or send us signs, I believe that as well as I've had some that it's easier to believe it's a sign than to believe in that much coincidence!

I'm so sorry for your loss, I know it's hard.  What you are going through with wishing you could go back and change things is common and normal in grief.  It's like we're wishing for a different outcome, but the truth is we can't be expected to have foreknowledge that is not ours to have!  We loved them as best as humanly possible and they know that.

I hope you will continue to come here and post and look at the other threads in this section as well to glean from them as well.  Sending you (((hugs)))