Kacy Posted April 26, 2019 Report Share Posted April 26, 2019 Today is 4 years since I lost my heart dog, Allie. It seems like she's been gone forever. I came to this forum 5 years ago, after the sudden loss of one of my other Cavaliers, Lucy. Since then, I have lost all 4 of my Cavaliers and also recently, my husband. I haven't even been able to post about his loss. It's all just overwhelming to me. I do have other dogs that I love dearly, but they don't bring the joy those 4 Cavaliers did. Some days, since my husband passed away, they are more stress than anything - as much as I hate to admit that. My Cavaliers, especially Allie, were very intuned to us, as well as close to each other. My current dogs are more to themselves. I so wish Allie was here now to help me get thru the loss of my husband. She was such a joy to me - so loving and gentle. Even after 4 years, I can't think about her without feeling sad. I know others say they reach a point that they can look back and smile at the memories, but I don't think I will ever feel that way. She was relatively young (9 years old) when she died, and I feel like we were cheated out of time together. I know others have said they just appreciate the time together, but I guess I don't look at it that way. I do try though to not let the resentment control my life, but it is a struggle some days. I've read some other posts here about how Spring can be such a hard season when you've had a loss. I feel that way, too. As much as I hate winter, Spring has brought so many conflicting feelings. If I block everything else out, it's so nice to see the flowers and trees starting to bloom and the sun shining. But then, it seems like that shouldn't be happening because my little dogs aren't here running out in the yard or my husband out cutting the grass. It all seems so wrong. I would like to thank Marty for this wonderful forum. Even though I don't post often, I do come here almost daily. It is the one place where people truly understand. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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