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My Sweet Bailey


Bailey’s Mom

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Bailey was the best gift I’ve ever been given and I have no words to describe how much I loved her.  She LOVED her tennis balls and I spent countless hours pitching them to her because of the joy it brought her which in turn made me happy.  

Living in Texas we didn’t see much snow, but she loved it!  The first time she saw snow, it had snowed about 6” while she was asleep and I opened the back door for her to go out but she stopped and refused when she saw this wall of white that was taller than she was.  I ended up putting on my coat and boots, and carried her out to the middle of our back yard where I gently put her down in it.  She wasn’t sure at all what to do, so I stood by her, encouraging her, and in about a minute she was running through the snow and sliding head first, having the time of her life!  She loved jumping to catch snowflakes in her mouth over and over again!  

After playing she loved to snuggle.  And I miss this so much!  Sometimes Bailey would smash her entire 60 lb.+ body as hard as she could against my legs, when I was laying in bed watching TV, or she would put her feet or head up on me.  And Bailey loved seeing animals on TV,  especially dogs.  Her favorite show was America’s Funniest Home Videos.  She knew to watch when she heard the song at the opening and as soon as clips came on with dogs in them her tail would wag like crazy and she’d start barking.  She liked seeing cats and some other animals, but mostly dogs.  

Bailey really was my best friend.  We both suffered from pain, which was especially bad the last 2-3 years.  I could tell if she was having a bad day and I’d bring her “dinner” to her on a tray.  We both had to take several pain medications, but Bailey kept me going as she still loved going out front to see the “kitty cat” who lived next door who is a very sweet cat.  Olivia, our cat friend, would come up to Bailey, face to face and then run off, knowing that Bailey couldn’t catch her. 

Bailey had tons of toys that we kept in a large basket and she loved pulling the basket over and pulling each one out, biting on most of them to make the squeakers squeak.  She loved fun but was never destructive and never caused any problems.  I never even heard her growl.  Everyone loved her.  I was so blessed to get to be her mom.

I can’t believe that she’s gone.  My heart is still so sad and it was a month on the 25th since I lost her.  I don’t know if I’ll ever get to have another dog, but I know that I’ll never have another Bailey.  She was truly my best friend.

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She is adorable!  I love the picture with her tennis ball in her mouth, little tennis ball girl!  She does sound like the best, I agree, lucky to have known her, let alone her be yours!

It is stuff like this that makes it so hard, the little interactions we have with them, that's what makes them unique and is the thing we love about them.  My dog made up and plays games with me.  I know there'll never be another Arlie and I dread the day he goes, but it's in the back of my mind, one of my greatest fears.

I'm so sorry you are missing her.  I believe wholeheartedly that we will be with them again and you'll get to throw tennis balls for her again.  Until then, I know you'll always be thinking of her and missing her.  Thank you for sharing pictures of her, she's beautiful.

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The pictures of your Bailey are precious ~ no wonder you miss her so! I loved reading your description of those special times with her. Preserve those special memories ~ and thank you for sharing them with all of us! ❤️

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Thanks kayc and MartyT, 

i really appreciated your kind words.  I thought I posted a reply earlier today but I guess I did something wrong so it didn’t post.  I’d been reading other people’s posts but I couldn’t share too much about my grief over losing my Bailey.  So, I never started a new discussion about her, I think because it made it too real.  Even now I couldn’t bear to share what happened the day I had to let her go but I just HAD to tell anyone who would listen about my girl and just how great she was.  Your kind words were healing to me and I’m really grateful that you took the time to share with me.  Your messages were the hugs I desperately needed.  

Thanks for the time you devote to care for all here who are walking through the dark and blinding pain of grief.  Your compassion is a healing balm for many, I’m sure, as it is for me.  

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  • 3 weeks later...

I’ve not been here for a good while because I read other stories and get so torn apart by them that I feel desperately overwhelmed with grief.  My Bailey will have been gone two months on the 25th, and my heart is still completely broken.  Tonight I’ve been crying and crying.  Tomorrow morning my daughter is coming by to drop off her dog for me to keep through Monday and he and Bailey were buddies for the last eight years.  Her dog hasn’t been here since 2 days before I lost Bailey and I can’t imagine having him around without her and it’s killing me!  I agreed to help her (my daughter) so she could go out of town, but I just burst into tears when I think of watching him run around and chase balls and play without Bailey.  He liked to snuggle by her, too, and I’m so dreading thisweekend.  I love her little dog but everything I did with him, I did with the two of them together.  The pain tonight is almost more than I can bear and I know that every single minute through Monday is going to be reminding me of how much I miss my Bailey girl.  I feel like a whiner but this has been by FAR the worst grief of my life and I wonder if my heart will ever heal. I’m scared that it won’t.

Bailey was just SO sweet and even though we were both pain patients for many years she loved chasing balls and having fun.  I’ve read others describe their pets as their best friends and even soul mates and I understand and feel both of those were true of Bailey and me.  I just want to see her again so terribly!  My Bailey was so brave those last weeks.  But I’m not brave at all.  I’m just missing my sweet Bailey more than my words can express.  

Edited by Bailey’s Mom
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It hurts for a long time, doesn't it, the triggers are hard. I will be thinking of you this weekend and hope you have some good moments without tears.  (((hugs)))

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