Jump to content
Grief Healing Discussion Groups

Started feeling guilty and blaming myself


Recommended Posts

I lost my first personal dog on Easter Sunday to a heart hemangiosarcoma that burster filling the pericardium sac arround the heart with blood, I am devastated, this was unexpected and I have been so very lost without him. The last few days I've been struggling with the fact that when I helped him cross over the rainbow bridge, I left the room within a minute. I am now thinking that I should of stayed with him a few more minutes. As I wonder when the brain catches up to the heart stopping. I can't stop thinking that he was alone during the brains shutting down process. I'm having such bad regrets. I feel like I failed him in his finale moments. I'm so very mad at myself and this thought has taken primary residents as a permanent thought that has been lingering over me the past few days. I can't stop thinking about it. I feel like I let my best friend down. I promised to be there until the very end, not skip out early. I hope one day I can forgive myself. I know this may sound illogical but I'm struggling.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • MartyT changed the title to Started feeling guilty and blaming myself

My dear, I urge you to have a visit with the veterinarian who administered the drugs that helped your dog cross over the Rainbow Bridge, as I think that is the person who can reassure you that once those drugs were given, your baby was no longer conscious and therefore no longer aware of your presence ~ or absence ~ when you left the room. That said, we humans almost always find a way to feel guilty when we choose to euthanize our beloved animal companions. One way or another, we find something about the process that feeds our guilt for making the decision in the first place. I think it's because this decision is such an awesome one, and taking responsibility for it engenders a truckload of guilt. Remember that guilt is a FEELING, and feelings aren't always rational, logical or justified. See Guilt in The Wake of The Euthanasia Decision.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Create New...