Gwenivere Posted May 28, 2019 Report Share Posted May 28, 2019 I googled......don’t want to live, don’t want to die. Found lots of articles called passive suicide. Very different than the definition os suicide with a plan and certain you want death. I discovered that is where I live, Day after day. Doing the routine things for routines sake. An aquaintance told me this weekend she had down days and she would forget to see the good things because she was trapped in the negative. I tried looking at the perspective and realized she battles nothing that is precedents by our huge loss and all that comes from it. The worst she was dealing was her wife getting a new job so she wouldn’t see her much over the week. No huge medical problems. No loss of her ability to work from medical conditions. So busy living a normal life. Goals, partnership even if less now. These articles stress purpose and meaning. All the typical things, join a church, take a walk in nature, volunteer, expand ways to be with people. They don’t say how you do that when you are disabled by 4 medical conditions that feed on each other. And in then it loops back in my mind to Steve. It always does and whoever here said........ I was killed and left alive. What was validating was this was very common. People here tha word suicide and assume that is what we want. It’s just stopping the pain and feeling like we mean something in this world again. To someone 24/7. Having someone you feel that way about. Have no time to write more because I have a therapy appointment and have to express some anger to him for how he adds to that. He’s a good therapist but won’t guve an inch in minutes unlike my counselor who will talk to me on the phone if needed. Just wanted to share this definition that fits me as we are taught not the say the S word. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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