My Baby Girl is gone....

[Cindy L]

My daughter died unexpectedly the day before her 37th birthday.

I could only take off 2 days from work and it is 3 weeks later and I am barely functioning.

I am raising her 12 year old son who lost his Daddy to suicide 3 years ago.

Looking for Support Group in Newport Beach, CA

I have to keep it together for my Grandson.  Keep reliving her life and the trauma I endured the day she died.

HELP ME!

 

 

 

[MartyT]

Cindy, my dear, my heart reaches out to you in the wake of this unspeakable loss ~ and this on top of losing your son-in-law to suicide. It's good that you've found your way to us, as we can offer reliable information, comfort and support ~ but you are wise to be looking for in-person grief support in your own community as well. You are suffering with two very traumatic deaths, and I hope you will find a grief counselor whose practice includes a trauma-informed approach to loss. (You may find this article helpful. Although the circumstances are different, Dr. Neimeyer's response to this bereaved mom may speak to you in a helpful way: Deadly Car Accident Takes Two Daughters.) 

There are two sources of support that I also want to recommend to you: The Compassionate Friends (local chapter here) and Explaining Suicide to A Child

I know that you can only take in just so much information right now, so I don't want to overwhelm you with more than you can digest. Still, I think it's essential that you avail yourself of all the resources you can find ~ and if you're too overwhelmed with grief, with work and with caring for your grandson, perhaps there is a close relative or good friend who could do some of this research for you. This is way too much for you to be managing all alone.

[Cindy L]

Thank you so much for the information.  I have to get through this for the sake of my 12 year old grandson who lost his Daddy 3 years ago and his Mommy 2 1/2 weeks.

[MartyT]

When you feel up to it, Cindy, you may find one or more of these articles helpful as you guide your grandson through these difficult losses: Children, Teens & Grief ~ but always remember that the best way to take care of your grandchild's grief is to take care of your own grief first. ♥

[kayc]

Cindy, I hope you will come here as often as you desire.  This is a safe place where you will receive understanding and a listening ear.  We want to be here for you.  My daughter just turned 37...she lost both her babies and her husband wants a divorce.  As bad as her life is right now, I can't imagine the pain of losing her, that loss for you and your grandson is tremendous.  I am so glad you have each other.  When my husband died, I only got 2 weeks off work because frankly I needed the income and my job couldn't survive w/o me much longer without replacing me.  We aren't made to lose our children, it's not supposed to happen that way!  But a lot of things happen that are not the way we feel they should...so hard to process.

Allow yourself your tears, be patient and understanding of yourself.  You may feel all kinds of emotions, even thinking you're going crazy or what happened to your brain...these are normal parts of grief.  

Sending you my thoughts and prayers for comfort.  (((hugs)))