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My girlfriend just lost her dad, and is pushing me away


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Hey, I'm gunna hev my name be blue in this as to avoid anyone who could know me to recognize me. That being said, my girlfriend of three months just lost her dad suddenly a few days ago. I was the first person she told and the second I found out I hoped on as many busses as it took to get to that hospital. I was too late, as was she and she didn't get to say goodbye to him, just his body. I was with her and her family for the rest of that day and since none of us could sleep but her I was with them for the morning as well, helped them run errands and such. However she didn't talk to me about what had happened to him but told everyone else that asked her, (I never asked her as I thought it'd be too hard, instead I asked a family member when she wasn't around) she didn't even talk to me really, and I understand that she just wanted to talk to the people who were grieving with her, so we stopped by my house and asked me to grab some of her stuff, but then her cousin came to the door with her and told me that she wanted to be alone but didn't want to hurt my feelings and wanted to give me a hug. A day passes and after I left her alone (only after checking up on her a few hours after she dropped me off) she texts me saying that she needs a roommate, so naturally I said I'd be willing to be her roommate, only to be met with I need someone who can pay $950, to which again I said that'd be no problem, and again only to be met with I need someone to keep it clean, so I just said ok I understand and left it at that. I'm lost, idk what to do, I overheard her crying in the middle of the night saying she can't get married without him here. We had previously talked about us getting married and having kids, but that's understandable she just lost her best friend, he's the one that raised her, her last parent. I feel so helpless, but I love her and j want to be their for her but I just feel like she's starting to push me away and I don't want that to happen. She's told me things that she never told anyone not even her dad and we were really close.

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I am sorry you find yourself in this situation and am sorry she lost her dad.  When my fiance's mother was dying, he broke up with me...by Fed Ex.  I have found it is actually common for those grieving to feel that they can't do a relationship at the same time as they are grieving.  I have read each and every thread in this section, and when you do that, you see a pattern.  It is likely she will want space and it will be important to respect that...any demands put on her will drive her away.  It's next to impossible for the relationship to survive when this happens.  I'm sorry, I want to be honest with you.

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