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The nights are brutal


Coco Forever

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Thank you, Dogmom.  That means a lot to me.  Trying to focus on the beautiful sweet memories rather that what I've lost, it's hard because they're so intertwined...

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I do know what you mean, it's like we carry our grief inside of us, w/o the release of tears, but it's there all of the time, a little more bearable, but there nonetheless, always lurking beneath the surface, ever on our minds.

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Kayc,MartyT,Dogmom + Archie11 sending love and hugs to you all that are hurting with the loss of our beloved pets be it weeks,months or years ago and Dogmom I’m with you as regards to your tears.Nearly 16 weeks since my boy passed and not a day as gone by without me crying a couple times a day and more so now as I’m now using the same sayings to the neighbours cat that I used for my Coco.I keep waiting for just one day that I’m free from the tears but that seems a very long way off.The saying that the grief will never go away we just learn to manage it I hope is true.

Frankie xx

 

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17 hours ago, Coco Forever said:

The saying that the grief will never go away we just learn to manage it I hope is true.

My husband was my world, I lost him 15 years ago.  I have found that to be true.

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I know what you mean about the lonely nights.The worst time of the day for me without doubt and dreading winter setting in.I still work so daytime is not to bad then I try keep busy when I finish either going for a run,the gym or just a walk as the doctors say the stress of losing him has caused my chest pain symptoms but I still get days four months on when I’m overcome with emotion thinking about him.Just find it so hard to accept I’ll never see him again.Sending hugs 

Frankie 

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For me, I think the mornings are the worst. I wake up knowing that I have another day ahead of me without having my little Roxie beside me, and the reminder that I will never see her again.

I took early retirement in June, and so I have a lot of free time "stuck" at home. I find myself replaying her last 2 days over and over in my head. Those 2 "bad" days are so fresh in my mind and I still cry when I remember them. Maybe less than before, but it's still every day. Tomorrow it will be 21 weeks... I miss her so much... This has been the worst 5 months of my life. 😢 Hoping that all of you are finding some moments of healing. We so desperately need them...

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Sending you a hug!1219728256_doghugduck.gif.b2467e13cc8a91e4cdd6a6c2d3f7140a.gif

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On 8/26/2020 at 6:56 PM, Dogmom said:

For me, I think the mornings are the worst. I wake up knowing that I have another day ahead of me without having my little Roxie beside me, and the reminder that I will never see her again.

I took early retirement in June, and so I have a lot of free time "stuck" at home. I find myself replaying her last 2 days over and over in my head. Those 2 "bad" days are so fresh in my mind and I still cry when I remember them. Maybe less than before, but it's still every day. Tomorrow it will be 21 weeks... I miss her so much... This has been the worst 5 months of my life. 😢 Hoping that all of you are finding some moments of healing. We so desperately need them...

I’m with you Dogmom regarding mornings and like yourself I can’t help but thinking of my Coco’s last months of suffering not to mention the haunting image of me leaving him on the vets floor after he’’d passed.Oh how I now wished I’d have stayed and held him in my arms a little longer.4 months for me and my grief still consumes my every waking day and even now I cannot look at any photos or videos of him as that is just too painful.Prayers and good health to you all in these strangest of times

Frankie xx

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Hi hope everyone is doing ok, nearly bedtime here which I dread as another day over without seeing Archie (8 weeks tomorrow since he passed) . A good friend who lost her dog just before Christmas is very understanding, she has kindly sewed together Archie’s 2 favourite blankets and made 3 blankets out of them for myself and my 2 daughters, I have mine on my bed and it is such a comfort and still smells of him! Wishing you all peace

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3 hours ago, Archie11 said:

Hi hope everyone is doing ok, nearly bedtime here which I dread as another day over without seeing Archie (8 weeks tomorrow since he passed) . A good friend who lost her dog just before Christmas is very understanding, she has kindly sewed together Archie’s 2 favourite blankets and made 3 blankets out of them for myself and my 2 daughters, I have mine on my bed and it is such a comfort and still smells of him! Wishing you all peace

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What a precious friend you have and what a special blanket for you and your girls! It brings tears to my eyes, so beautiful.

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@Archie11 What a wonderful idea!  I threw Arlie's away as it had that cancer odor, very pungent.  It was hard to do so but it reminded me of the cancer and his suffering.  Still have his bed, although I washed the cover.  And I have the blanket he used in the car.

You do indeed have a wonderful understanding friend.  Yesterday I got a horrible response from someone in my Diabetes forum accusing me of loving animals more than people, just because I said my blood sugar rose with my dog's cancer diagnosis and stayed elevated for seven months, long after he was gone.  I figure it was Arlie's last gift to me, that of prompting me to DO something about my Diabetes, which I'd ignored (unsuccessfully) for over ten years.  I'm nearly off medicines for it and have it controlled for the first time, plan to be totally off in a week!  (Being a mod, I deleted his comments and stuck him on post approval for it.)  But gee, with people like that, why wouldn't I prefer dogs!  But nothing in my post suggested such.  His remark was very upsetting to me, I am still very much grieving my Arlie.  I think I always will.  At least those here "get it."

 

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4 hours ago, kayc said:

 But gee, with people like that, why wouldn't I prefer dogs! 

 

He has clearly not allowed an animal to grace his life with their presence and is losing out on a beautiful relationship. He cannot fathom it. Truly his loss. Here, you are with people who understand, yes, we get you!

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I am lucky to have her as a friend, sorry to hear about that person upsetting you Kayc, you are such a good person and don’t deserve that, I have 2 daughters but now I have lost Archie it feels like I have lost my only son. This group has been so supportive for us all, we are always here and you will always have your wonderful memories of life with Arlie x

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23 hours ago, MartyT said:

You've probably read it before, Kay, but you might want to read this one again: Is Pet Loss Comparable to Loss of a Loved One?  ❤️

Yeah, I remember that one.  It was someone from a different country/culture was reacted to my telling him his flirtatious remark to me was inappropriate.  You can do what you want to me but leave my dog out of this!  :D

 

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17 hours ago, Archie11 said:

I am lucky to have her as a friend, sorry to hear about that person upsetting you Kayc, you are such a good person and don’t deserve that, I have 2 daughters but now I have lost Archie it feels like I have lost my only son. This group has been so supportive for us all, we are always here and you will always have your wonderful memories of life with Arlie x

Thank you!  It's okay, he's gone now.  Kind of stupid, really, to speak like that to a moderator! :D  Besides, we all look out for each other.

 

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17 hours ago, Archie11 said:

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:D

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Is it wrong to love an animal more than a human?I certainly don’t think so as I’ve had many friends and family members die but I can freely admit and I hope this does not sound heartless but  I have not grieved nowhere near as much as what I have for my Coco and that does not give me any guilty feelings whatsoever.They want for nothing but food,love and exercise and that love what is given back to us is unconditional.I hope everyone is bearing up and staying safe and healthy in these horrible of times.

Frankie xx

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On 9/9/2020 at 3:31 AM, Coco Forever said:

Is it wrong to love an animal more than a human?

Not by my way of looking at it!  If they're more lovable, why wouldn't you love them more?  Besides, they are more a part of our everyday lives than the humans are often.  You are so right about their unconditional love!

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