emails to late wife

[mick]

I lost my beloved wife of 53 years three months ago. I have been a wretched, suicidal mess. With the virus I haven't even been able to go to the VA. But I found a way to feel just a little bit better. I email my late beloved every day. I keep her updated on my day, and to apologize for many bad things I said and done and the things I should not have said and done, and times I should have just shut up. I tell her how much I still love her, and sorry I did not not show enough affection and intimacy, taking her for granted. Cancer took her so fast, and I didn't realize how much I loved her until she passed in my arms. It helps to believe she is getting these emails.

 

[MartyT]

Good for you, Mick, for finding something that works for you and, as you say, helps you to feel just a little bit better. We're all different, and different things work for different folks, but writing is an excellent choice:  Writing As A Healing Tool in Grief

[Kieron]

Being a writer, this is something I appreciate and something I have done often in a private, online journal where no one will see it.

[kayc]

George and my relationship BEGAN with letters so it doesn't seem odd it ended with them as well, only I don't get any back this time.  I started a computer file "letters to George" and write to him periodically as needed, less as time goes by but still checking in and talking to him.  I talk out loud to him in my thoughts or voice and always will.  He's very much a part of me.

[Gwenivere]

I don’t write to Steve, but I do talk to him.  Not the screaming pain and anger that was so hard for the first 3 years, tho that happens when a crisis comes up I feel unequipted to handle.  But I do talk to him in short spurts.  Things pop into my head I would tease him about or something on the news he should know, whatever.  Sometimes I hear his voice in my head and reply to it.  Anyone hearing would think I was nuts.  Not something I care about.  It’s hard enough doing this, much less caring what people think, alone.    

[Gwenivere]

8 hours ago, Kieron said:

Being a writer, this is something I appreciate and something I have done often in a private, online journal where no one will see it.

I’m just curious, Kieron.   Isn’t doing anything online subject to being accessed if someone wanted to hack in?  I used to journal on my iPad, but now that I think about it, I suppose someone could getvin here and see anything I do.  I guess nothing we do that involves a computer is truly safe or absolutely private.

[Kieron]

Yes, anything can be hacked given someone who is determined and skilled enough.  😒