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Mark2020

I just lost my 13 year old brother.

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I don’t even know where to start. On July 2nd 2020, just a couple days ago, my little brother left the Earth. The few weeks prior to his death he was quite sick (and in the hospital), however we had hope that he was going to survive. Things took a turn for the worst on the 2nd when he stopped breathing and his heart stopped beating... he was unable to be revived. That was the worst phone call ever to receive. I wasn’t even at the hospital with him (it was very early morning), though I had plans to go see him as soon as we woke up... I never got the chance to properly say goodbye to him. All the things that I will never be able to do with him, see him do, etc., hurt so badly. I keep having dreams that he is still alive and/or that the treatment he was going to receive was working... then I wake up and realize that was just a dream and the pain of his absence hits me so hard. He has only been gone a few days, yet I miss him so much. It seems like a lifetime ago that I last saw his sweet little face. 
 

I am really struggling and don’t really have anyone who knows what I am going through. So, I figured I would post here and see what happens. I am so sorry for any and all of you that have experienced the loss of a loved one. Thank you for listening to me.

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My dear Mark, my heart hurts for you as I read your tragic story, and I'm so very sorry to learn of the death of your little brother. You're so right ~ at your young age, it's quite likely that few of your friends could even begin to understand how it feels to lose a sibling ~ or any other close family member, for that matter. And surely your parents are immersed in their own grief, so you may feel as if you've been left with nowhere to turn. It's no wonder that you're feeling so isolated and alone.

In addition to the support you will find here (and I'm so pleased that you've found us!) I encourage you to think carefully about any relative, neighbor, teacher, pastor or other caring adult you may know who might serve as a sounding board for you ~ someone who will listen without judgment and give you a shoulder to lean on.

I also invite you to read these articles:

Grieving The Death Of A Sibling (Article by Eleanor Haley)

Sibling Loss: When Grief Goes Unacknowledged (Article by Marty Tousley)

Sibling Grief: Have We Forgotten Them? (Article by Maureen Hunter)

And explore these online resources:

National Students of AMF App for Grieving Young Adults - An app for your phone that connects you with other bereaved young adults

 Too Damn Young - A community and resource for teens and young adults who are navigating grief

Teen Grief Resources - Helpful videos produced by teens for young people in grief

Sounds of the Siblings - Facebook group for those who've lost a sibling

TCF SIBS - Facebook group for those who've lost a sibling

Talkspace for Teens - Matches you with a counselor who understands the challenges teenagers face 

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I am so sorry.  I lost a sister but she was no longer young, had lived a horrendous life as a quadriplegic, trapped in her body.  There's a big difference between someone being released from their suffering and someone who is so young and as their life ahead of them.  I cannot imagine, but my heart goes out to you in your loss...

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