Successfully talking to your spouse (after they're gone)

[nashreed]

I feel like I finally had a focused successful conversation with my beloved Annette. Every morning, I walked around a disused basketball court here and try to focus and have a talk with her, and I usually get distracted easily or I sound silly  to myself "talking to myself". But today, I actually was able to keep focused and expressed what I had to say and could imagine in my head what see would say (when my thick brain actually figured out something that she knew to be obvious, she would go "Ding, ding, ding").

I'm still frustrated and upset that I haven't gotten much in the way of signs or spiritual communication with her. I know that it would be difficult for her, and that it is going to be very rare if it does occur. I wonder if I'm just too dense and not spiritually enlightened to be able to "hear" her. 

It did make me feel better to have a "talk" with her, and I wonder how long it may have taken you all to be successful at what I find to be a challenge. 

James

 

[kayc]

6 minutes ago, nashreed said:

I haven't gotten much in the way of signs or spiritual communication with her.

The connection is the love we have in our heart.  Not able to conjure up signs either but I think I posted an article about it for you once, not sure if you read it or not. Here it is for you again...http://www.griefhealingblog.com/2010/06/after-death-communication.html

[nashreed]

Yes, I just hate to think that I might be blocking her being able to come through because I might be being too hard on myself, with guilt.

[nashreed]

And on a tangent... I wonder if anybody has ever had an experience seeing what I guess would be an "orb". It's unusual because I see it in my phone camera. I take pictures of CD's to sell on Ebay. A couple of times now, I have seen a tiny little orb fly into the camera frame. I have an open window for better light, setting the disc on a chair. I would say there might be glare shining off the plastic case, except it zooms in as a little ball of light, like a bug would. It only happens once a session as well. Just a funny thought that she might be saying "Hi" to me in that way. I just would think that it's pretty hard to be seen if you were spirit energy, and I certainly don't want her hanging around as a "ghost". Just curious to me.

[kayc]

No, I've never seen an orb.

I hope you can be understanding of yourself as it does no good to be down on yourself for being hard on yourself!    This is the hardest thing in the world to go through and I think they'd be the first to understand even though they never had to go through this, because they understood us!

[nashreed]

I think I finally am getting the hang of talking to Annette. It's hard to focus on a monologue, but when it works I can hear in my head what her response to what I'm saying would be- and that is very comforting and makes me feel a lot better. I need my morning walks (and talks) with her- they're very good for my psyche right now.

[shebert56]

Nashreed, wanted to send some love and light to you.

Keep talking to Annette.  She hears you.  I talk to Stephen every day.  Know in your heart she hears you.  

I've heard many thoughts on why we feel we don't receive signs from our loved ones across the veil.  We want smack you in the face signs. And then we try to convince ourselves it couldn't be a sign. For most, it's a smaller, gentler sign.  Easy to miss.  Here's an example for me recently:  I spent two days in deep grief a few weeks back.  Now I know Stephen is "still right here."  But I couldn't lift my spirits or vibration.  Upon coming out of the grief, I was driving somewhere.  I never look at license plates in front of me, but a strong urge came across that I should.  License plate on the car directly in front of me read - CME.  I said Okay, I see you.💚

I had lots of undeniable signs especially within the first six months.  No, I don't see him here, he doesn't talk to me.  But oh there are so many others.  I know his soul, and I know when the sign is from him.    

Center on the heart.  And do keep talking to Annette.

~Shirley

[nashreed]

33 minutes ago, shebert56 said:

Nashreed, wanted to send some love and light to you.

Keep talking to Annette.  She hears you.  I talk to Stephen every day.  Know in your heart she hears you.  

I've heard many thoughts on why we feel we don't receive signs from our loved ones across the veil.  We want smack you in the face signs. And then we try to convince ourselves it couldn't be a sign. For most, it's a smaller, gentler sign.  Easy to miss.  Here's an example for me recently:  I spent two days in deep grief a few weeks back.  Now I know Stephen is "still right here."  But I couldn't lift my spirits or vibration.  Upon coming out of the grief, I was driving somewhere.  I never look at license plates in front of me, but a strong urge came across that I should.  License plate on the car directly in front of me read - CME.  I said Okay, I see you.💚

I had lots of undeniable signs especially within the first six months.  No, I don't see him here, he doesn't talk to me.  But oh there are so many others.  I know his soul, and I know when the sign is from him.    

Center on the heart.  And do keep talking to Annette.

~Shirley

Thank you! Absolutely- she knows I'll be walking in the same place around the same time every morning. I have to start my day talking to her. I love saying her name too much to not talk to her. 

[Kieron]

One summer day, about a year after, give or take, I was shopping in a big thrift department store, going through racks of shirts and tops to see if something caught my eye.  We'd been to this store a million times together, each going our own way and converging afterward with whatever we'd each found.  I was wistful, thoughtful and sad while still enjoying the "hunt."  There's always music from the sound system going, not loudly but just enough to pick out.  At one point, I noticed the song was "Higher Love" by Steve Winwood, a 1986 hit that is timeless and fresh even years later.  I immediately knew it was playing just for me.  I considered it a cosmic wink.

https://youtu.be/k9olaIio3l8

 

"Think about it, there must be higher love

Down in the heart or hidden in the stars above

Without it, life is a wasted time

Look inside your heart, I'll look inside mine."

(sorry, the music video is an utter disservice to the song...)

[kayc]

I talk to George all the time, but then I talk to Arlie too.  If I hear an audible voice I probably won't tell anyone because then I'd get hauled off.  

But seriously, our connection with them is so deep, we already know their responses, it helps to pour out our souls to them.  So much unknown about the spirit plane and how it all works, but keep your mind/heart open for even what you don't know, accept on faith what you can't explain.  

[nashreed]

It helps my sanity too, to talk with her and express my frustration (about the election, etc.) and to let her know I always am thinking of her. I will always keep her memory alive. 

[Gwenivere]

I know what you mean,  this year is historical in many ways.  Not sharing that it is so very hard.  I miss being able to get his take on things and have discussions with someone like minded.  Even handling the pandemic would be easier to have someone I could touch.

[shebert56]

23 hours ago, nashreed said:

Thank you! Absolutely- she knows I'll be walking in the same place around the same time every morning. I have to start my day talking to her. I love saying her name too much to not talk to her. 

Yes!  I go out each morning to look for constellation Orion.  And I know Stephen is connecting with me at that moment.  Yesterday I was finishing second coat of paint on a spare bedroom (painting, what a drag!).  A song came on Pandora that was one of Stephen's favorites.  I danced around with paint brush in hand, knowing he was dancing with me.

I am sure most of us absolutely treasure hearing our loved one's name.  Before I relocated several states from Florida to be near family, I would greet neighbors and always talk about Stephen.  Eventually they came to know that it was not a subject to avoid.  When we speak their names, they hear it across the veil.  And it makes them happy!

Sometime in the past five months, I had my first and only astral dream.  In the dream, Stephen came to me and said he could only stay one hour.  I don't recall what we did, but he then said I have to go.  I was distressed at that and he leaned in and gave me a big tight hug.  I immediately woke up, and I could physically feel that hug on my body.  Knowing he has things to do and continued learning on that side, I know he was telling me he's okay.  And that I'll be okay too.

Yeah, we'll always miss the physical.  But we still have a relationship with them, and it's an eternal one.  It's just different.  And they give us a gentle nudge and say "I'm still here, but go now and live your life."  💚

 

8 hours ago, nashreed said:

It helps my sanity too, to talk with her and express my frustration (about the election, etc.) and to let her know I always am thinking of her. I will always keep her memory alive. 

No one knows you better than Annette, so of course she wants to listen!  🥰

 

~Shirley

[Gwenivere]

6 hours ago, shebert56 said:

I immediately woke up, and I could physically feel that hug on my body. 

 

What a great gift.  I dream of Steve, but it’s mostly seeing and interacting it’s him.  I would love to feel his touch again in any way.

6 hours ago, shebert56 said:

I would greet neighbors and always talk about Stephen.  Eventually they came to know that it was not a subject to avoid.  When we speak their names, they hear it across the veil. 

I don’t know if they hear it, but I never have forgotten a saying....as long as someone keeps saying your name, you still live on here.  People have to get used to my referring to our house, our grill, whatever.  What’s sad to me is very few people talk to me about him anymore.  I don’t think it’s because they think they will upset me.  I’ll find out Friday on his leaving anniversary as I am planning to remind his buddies as I know they don’t have the date etched in their minds.