Guilt and regret for pets life

[Mollys mum]

My cat Molly passed away two years ago at the age of 13. I feel so guilty for not giving her a better life. Due to me having MS and being exhausted all the time, having severe anxiety, and my son having bad allergies, she spent most of her time outside when i know she wanted to be around us more. I know i did the best i could and life is busy and i genuinely loved her, but i wish i’d done more for her. I suffer so much guilt about the life she had, it’s like a nightmare. I wish i could change it and i wish i could find a way to forgive myself so i can be a loving partner and better mum to my two boys. Is anyone else experiencing anything like this? 

[MartyT]

My dear, I invite you to read this article, as I think the response I gave this reader could have been written just for you: Pet Loss: When Guilt Overshadows Grief  ❤️

[kayc]

I am so sorry for your loss.  Life can be really hard sometimes.  I felt that way with my dog Teddy years ago.  My then-husband wouldn't allow him in the house for years, he was stuck in a pen as I had babies and was caregiver to my Mil, who was bedridden with cancer for three years.  I felt horrible about the life we gave Teddy.  He was a wonderful Golden Retriever and deserved so much better.  Now I'd never marry a man that didn't allow dogs in the house but I had no idea at the time, he acted like he liked dogs.  I STILL feel bad about it, but all I can do is tell him how much I love him and wish he'd had a better life here...I know his life is better now and believe I'll be with him again.  I hope this brings you some degree of comfort to think upon:

 

[Mollys mum]

4 hours ago, kayc said:

I am so sorry for your loss.  Life can be really hard sometimes.  I felt that way with my dog Teddy years ago.  My then-husband wouldn't allow him in the house for years, he was stuck in a pen as I had babies and was caregiver to my Mil, who was bedridden with cancer for three years.  I felt horrible about the life we gave Teddy.  He was a wonderful Golden Retriever and deserved so much better.  Now I'd never marry a man that didn't allow dogs in the house but I had no idea at the time, he acted like he liked dogs.  I STILL feel bad about it, but all I can do is tell him how much I love him and wish he'd had a better life here...I know his life is better now and believe I'll be with him again.  I hope this brings you some degree of comfort to think upon:

 

Thanks for responding. Im so sorry you feel guilt too. It sounds like you were also doing the best you could. My ex husband wasn’t very nice to Molly so I understand how challenging that can be when you are already struggling to cope with everything. I know it’s our perception that we made the wrong choices for our pets that causes the guilt, but we have to try to remember we were doing the best we could at the time. I know how hard that is, especially when other people appear to be doing it better. But everyone’s experiences and circumstances are so different. Sending you love and peace ❤️ 

[Mollys mum]

5 hours ago, MartyT said:

My dear, I invite you to read this article, as I think the response I gave this reader could have been written just for you: Pet Loss: When Guilt Overshadows Grief  ❤️

Thanks Marty, I really appreciate you sending me that link and it definitely has helped. I need to keep reminding myself I was doing the best I could at the time. ❤️