Cross Stitch Art

[Novi]

My mom loved to do cross stitch. Growing up I remember her working on them every evening in the living room. She had a table set up and she would work on her cross stitch projects while we watched tv. The living room and halls were adjourned with her framed art. 

Well when she died she split them between my brother and I. There was about a dozen frames. I never liked them. They didn't match my place and for the last 12 years I've stored them under the futon in the spare room. There was really only one that I liked, which I hung up for a few years but eventually took down and stored with the rest. 

January is always a rough time for me, being it the month my dad killed himself many years ago. I always do unpredictable moody things (my mom was actually the one that pointed this out a long time ago, having noticed a pattern.) 

The other night I decided I would try to sell her cross stitch frames online, I don't like them and they just take up space. At least if someone can appreciate them I think that's better than me keeping them for nothing other than sentimental value and my inability to let go. I was planning to rehang the one that I sort of liked and get rid of the rest, if they didn't sell I was planning to donate them to Goodwill. I reached under the futon and pulled out the stack, only to cut myself on broken glass. The one that I liked (it was of a black horse in a field) was broken. I was so angry for both having cut myself and the irony of the ONLY one I somewhat liked was broken that I gathered all the glass and marched it straight outside to the dumpster, art and all. I regret it now, I could have had it reframed but then I ask myself why?? I don't even like it that much! My mother liked horses, not me. I like cats! I wish I didn't feel so bad, because realistically the art I don't think will sell online and will end up at Goodwill, and they will probably throw them out. I suppose it's just easier if I'm not the one doing it, or even knowing about it.

I know it's stupid. My mom would not want me being upset over something so trivial. I can't wait for January to be over so I can think straight again. 

[kayc]

It's okay.  My brother got rid of all my mom's stuff during a huge snowstorm so I couldn't come there then and he wouldn't wait a couple of days.  Life goes on.  I think my kids will get rid of everything I own, not a second glance.  We carry what we really need inside our hearts.  So I wonder why I have this house full of stuff I don't want...short answer is I was working, then had a continual surge of injuries and the last few years have had so many hand injuries that have left me with 10% strength, continual pain and numbness which make it impossible for me to go through stuff, let alone, box it up and take it 50+ miles away to get rid of it (no place local).  So it stays.  If I ever have to move (have been here over 45 years) I'll have an estate place take care of whatever I don't take and a junk hauler the rest.  After seeing what my sister's place was like (she lived there nearly 50 years and they were packrats) and how it was handled, I was impressed (she died 3/28/22).  So don't sweat your mom's cross stitches and frames.

[Novi]

Thank you @kaycI feel much better having just talked about it. Very true that what we carry is inside our hearts. We place too much value on possessions. I don't want to be controlled by inanimate objects. There will be no one to take my things once I'm gone and I would really like to free myself from all of it. I want to move somewhere one day, away from the busy city. It will be much easier if I have less to pack (if it was just me and the cats would be perfect!)