Does death of a family member affect relationships?

[Winchester]

Hi everyone! Thank you to developers and creators of this website, you guys are doing a great job helping people out there.

My boyfriend of 3 years broke up with me a week after his dad passed away, which happened on 28th of July. He said it was all our fault (that his dad died of heart attack, even though his gradpa died from the same reason), and keeps believing to nonsense theory from his relatives, who claim that "if my boyfriend got married earlier on, probably his dad wouldn't die this young" (at the age of 53).

I lied to my boyfriend about my citizenship status because from the beginning he didn't like foreigners and he worked for police, so according to a real law here, foreigners can't marry local military and policemen. I thought our love would change him eventually, he found out the truth about my status in June, and he said he can't lose his job to be with me, because it will affect his family. His mom is controlling, and when she found out about my citizenship she insisted on us breaking up immediately and finding new person asap. 
 

My boyfriend keeps believing this idea of "it's all his fault his dad died". Now he says, he can't forgive himself for it and can't be with me anymore. He is in grief and totally crushed, crying everyday, lack of sleep, will, appetite. I was comforting him the day when he broke up with me. He said he loves me, but he can't go against his family's will. He didn't delete or block me as he usually did before when we broke up many times in the past... he even offered me financial help and gave me money to buy new phone, but i felt guilty and refunded the money. 
 

I feel devastated too, because right now it is affecting me, and i'm not in the best place in life atm. I would like him to come back and work this through... but i'm sure loss of a parent changed him. What do you guys think? Thank you

[kayc]

It changes people and usually if they break up it's for good.  I am so sorry, it's so hard. 💙

[kayc]

My advice is to get out and see people, do things,  to occupy your time so you don't hae as much time to dwell on yourmloss.