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Putting Our Best Friend To Sleep


ltshoemake

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Our beloved little dog, Chisum had cancer and we had to have him put to sleep 4/23. He had melanomia cancer, and it progressed very fast. This will be a day I will never forget. I think this was the most painful day of my life next to the day my Mother died. I feel guilty that I couldn't protect him from this as I have from other things all of his 14 years. I miss this small sized friend with the heart of a giant. I hurt deeply and am greving badly. When does this hurt let up so life can go on?

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I'm so sorry about the loss of Chisum. It is obvious that you provided for him a wonderful 14 years!!! Wow. Please, please try not to feel guilty. It was his time (even though if it had been up to you, he would have lived exactly as long as you...). It was nothing that you did. His little body was wearing out; even without the cancer, his body wasn't designed to live much (if any) longer, for whatever reason. God/nature created his little body that way. But his spirit is very much alive; it's just not in his body anymore. You will be reuinted, but in the meantime, his spirit is experiencing only bliss--no emotional or physical pain!

Chisum loves you as much as you love him. He doesn't want you to be paralyzed by grief, even though the grieving process naturally brings with it a lot of sadness. But life does eventually make a way for you to go on, and even to be happy again, although it doesn't seem right now that it could ever be possible.

What a major change in your life--I know.

In my grief over the loss of my sweet Little Girl, what helped the most was talking to people in my life who understood this heart-wrenching grief, spending hours upon hours on 3 different pet-loss grief-support groups I'm on, and even watching some really good movies. ....One day at a time...

You are in my thoughts and prayers. Much love,

Little Girl's Mommy, Kathy

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Itshoemake,

I am so sorry for your lose. What a wonderful 14 years you gave him!

The pain you are feeling will decrease, day by day, week by week. In the

last fews years I had to make the same kind of decission {sp.} In less than one year I had to put to sleep Kasey, a wonderfil female Rottie and Randall,

a Dobbie. They both had a fast killing cancer. I understand what you are going through right now. I still miss them both deeply, but I know in my heart it was the right thing to do. I'm sure your little guy was suffering

and in pain. We all tried to protect our pets from harm, but try to remember

they are all God's creatures and He decides when it is time to call them home. You were very honored for having 14 years with your Chisum.

Take care, you are in my thought and prayers.

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I know exactly what you are going through. Last Tuesday, April 20th, I has to put my boy Chowzer to sleep. He was a few months from his 15th birthday, and has been with me since he was 6 weeks old. Our bond was obsessive on both sides. My wife even got jealous at times. I took him everywhere, slept with him, have been greeted by him for so long - it is so hard to realize he is gone. I want to write a book about his life so I can hold on to every memory I have of Chowz. And anytime I do get him off my mind I feel guilty for leaving my boy behind. His problem was a failing kidney, and a weak heart with a murmur as well. We learned a month ago it was getting much worse and his BUN and creatine blood levels had skyrocketed. His red blood cell count was down. We did I.V, diet, meds, anything to help but it did not help our Chowz. They day before we put him to sleep was terrible, the night before was like a countdown to some nightmare. Knowing how ill he was and what we had to do. THen looking into his eyes as he died, kissing him and letting him know I loved him and everything was going to be alright Brutal! And then bringing his lifeless little cocker body back home to bury in my back yard - the absolute worst day in my life. I was kinda numb all day long. Now reality has set in, coming home to a quiet house, just realizing he is not going to come running up. I just try to stay busy, but it is hard to do some times. And I agree, many people just have no idea. I get so angry when close friends or relatives do not show the respect Chowzer deserves or the empathy that I deserve, and so need at this difficult time. It does seem like nobody understands. Hang in there, I am doing my best to remember all our good times, and realize that he has had a great influence for who I am, what I accomplish in life - so I will think of him with all my future successes in life.

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I am so so sorry for your loss. I am so sick of cancer. After Petey had his first chemo, and his last, I was asking the Oncologist, the technicians, and my own vet, if there was something in my house killing my cats with cancer. Six out of seven of our kids have died to cancer. They were all very supportive, however I still have a difficult time with what has happened. One of our kids was perfectly fine in the am, eating, playing, and on and on. By mid afternoon he was lethargic and looking weak. We called the vet and immediately brought him in. At 6:30 pm we got the call from the vet that he was on his way over...to put our boy to seelp. I just can't understand or will ever comprehend how fast those cancer cells can grow, not that it would make any of us feel any better.

When does the hurt go away. Personally I don't think it will ever go away. I think we learn to deal with it and the pain decreases in it's intensity. In the beginning of March I thought I was going to die I hurt so bad. Thanks to friends, people that understand, and talking about my losses as much as I need too, I am now as I call it back among the living. I truly believe that the death of our beloved furrball friends changes one's path in life. I have already experienced many changes in my thinking and have made some positive changes since Petey died. For me it is a way to honor him and the other six kids that have died in the last four years. As someone said, take it one day at a time or even one second at a time.

I created a rescue list that I taped on a kitchen cabinet. It has phone numbers of friends to call, some great books I found that read in about 15 minutes, reminds me to journal, take baby steps, take a walk around the block. Whatever works for you, do it. Someone said to me "you need to take care of you". I responded with "I don't want too". Well it was amazing how people were calling me out of the blue, great books and reading on breavement. Slowly I began to take care of me.

Petey and his two brothers and one sister would have been 3 on 4/23. I had a ceremony for them. Next year I will be remember you and your beloved Chisum.

Fran

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