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Dream I Had About My Dad Lastnight


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lastnight was the first time i had a dream about my dad since he died, he died 2 weeks and one day ago. ive heard stories of peoples whos parents come to them visually to let them know everythings ok, well im scared of the ghosts and spirits stuff, i use to hear and see things all the time when i was younger so im scared to death of that stuff, and my dad knew i was scared of that stuff. but i have been talking to my dad letting him know if he comes to me to please come to me in a dream that way i wont be scared.

well lastnight i dreamt that i was at my paretns house and i was sitting in the livingroom with my mom and brother and my dad was sitting on the couch but he was dead and we knew he was dead, but he was only was only dead for a second of the dream, then all of a sudden he was alive and playing with their dog and i look over at my mom and ask her if she sees what i see, and she says yes, then my dad turns to us and starts talking to us, i cant remember exactly what all he says, but then its just me in the house and hes telling me everything will be ok and that he knows i love him and then all of a sudden we are standing near the front door of the house and im scared to hug him b/c i knew he was just laying there dead, but i go up to him and hug him real quick and tell him i love him and miss him so much then i wake up.

i dont know if that dream was just a dream or my dads way of coming to me in a dream like i asked him to. what do u guys think? when i woke up i was actually calm, i know usually dreams like that probably would have freaked me out when waking up from it. but i was calm and it made me cry b/c i missed my dad so much and it felt like he came to me.

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I had a similar thing happen about a week or so after my mom passed away. Like you, I was desperate to talk to her/see her again and I longed for a dream with her in it or something that would allow me to connect with her again. I posted in an earlier thread about this, so I'll just copy and paste it into this one. I'm too apathetic to edit it at the moment, so not all of it may be relevant to your post.

Hi Anne, I'm sorry about your loss... I lost my mom almost 2 weeks ago, very suddenly in an accident, and since I've never met my father it feels like I've lost both parents at once. I am 25 and my mom was 49, less than a month away from 50.

I may be getting to this thread a little late, but I'll gladly share my experience with you and I hope it can help you, even just a bit.

This is very hard for me to type, but I'll try not to forget anything. I'm not a religious person, but I do believe in God and I talk to God often. After my mom's death (it still doesn't seem real - though I know it is), I was desperate for some sort of sign that she was ok and happy where she was. I went to the viewing and sat beside her for a long time, hoping that I would somehow feel closer to her or that I would feel her presence. I felt nothing, and in retrospect I'm glad I didn't, because I'd hate to think that she was lingering around, suffering. About 1/2 a week ago or so (the days kind of blend together) I had a dream in which I was with her, driving in her car down the same streets we drove together countless times. We went back to a house that I knew was hers, though I had never been there before because it wasn't the house she lived in. She was laying on a bed in the living room and she looked many years younger. At some point I realized it was a dream, which never happens to me, and I began asking her questions - is she ok/happy, is God with her etc. She answered all those questions in a way that made me feel better, but in a way as if I couldn't understand because I'm still here. But when I told her how bad I was suffering, she looked confused as if she vaguely remembered those sorts of things but could no longer relate. Almost like if I were trying to explain life to a baby in the womb. I'm still confused as to whether or not it was just my imagination, but I think if it was she would have answered some of my questions differently... I awoke after I had asked a few questions, even though I tried desperately to hold on to the dream I could not. I don't necessarily feel her presence near me, but though the dream made me feel quite strangly, it helped in a way... anyways, sorry for the long rambling post, it was very hard to write, but I just wanted to share this with you. J.

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wow that was a very interesting dream. thanks for sharing that with me. i never really told my dad i loved him or hugged him much and the last few days it has been bothering me really bad, and then i have this dream where he comes ot me and tells me everything is gonna be ok and he knows i love him. and then i get to hug him and tell him ilove him one last time before i woke up. i really feel it was my dads way of coming to me. like in ur dream i really think that was ur moms way of coming to u.

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The topic of grief dreams is fascinating, and one that we've discussed previously in these forums. If you've not seen it already, you might want to read the post in our Behaviors in Bereavement forum entitled "Strange Dreams about Death," dated 28 November 2005. You can access it directly by clicking on this link:

http://hovforum.ipbhost.com/index.php?show...st=0entry2900

See also Is It True? Will I See Her Again?

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Hi Marty

I as not sure about dream for the last 5 night the dreams I had where from the past when my dad died, anut, mom in hospial and furenells, i had got sleeping pill and thought maybe they cause them, so did not take last night and up till 3:30 an other 3 hour night i just can win.Are the dreams to help,for they just make me feel more guilty about their death.Just waiting for grandmothers turn to hunt me. Hope you can help

Tracey

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bmsbabygirl,

I would say that the dream was your father "visiting" and letting you know everything is ok, in my opinion. I've always had weird dreams, but I can usually figure out the meanings of them. Sometimes there isn't a meaning, like if you watch a movie before you go to bed and it has a snake in it and then you dream about a snake. That's pretty obvious! But I think you can usually just feel when a dream has a special meaning to it. Also the fact that you felt calm when you woke up is a sign to me that your father was getting in touch with you.

Hugs,

Shell

Tracey,

I would think your dreams are just your mind going over all the stuff that happened. Don't feel guilty about their deaths because of these dreams. It's just your mind re-living all the bad stuff. I feel for you...dreams like that can be horrible. Try to think of something else or read something thought provoking before you go to bed. Or watch something light on tv...maybe your mind will grab onto that instead.

Hugs,

Shell

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Tracey, dear,

I’m not sure what you’re asking me, but it seems as if you are not getting the help you need, or whatever you’ve tried so far isn’t working very well for you.

I cannot emphasize enough the importance of positive self-care strategies in the face of grief and loss. The only way to make grief more manageable is to empower ourselves to take good care of our bodies, our minds, and our hearts, so that we stay physically and emotionally healthy enough to deal with it. Are you seeing your primary care physician regularly, so he or she can evaluate the effectiveness of whatever medication has been prescribed for you? Oftentimes finding the “right” medication(s) requires a certain amount of trial-and-error time, and your physician should be monitoring you closely to see what is working or not working for you. Have you found an “in person” grief support group? Are you meeting with a grief counselor who can help you work through all that guilt you’re carrying around with you? Have you done any reading about grief so you know what is normal, what reactions you can expect, and what you can do to cope with and to manage those reactions? Have you tried writing as a way to get some of those feelings outside yourself and into a journal? (See, for example, Writing As a Way of Healing: How Telling Our Stories Transforms Our Lives, and Writing to Heal the Soul: Transforming Grief and Loss through Writing.)

Since you have access to the Internet, you have so many resources to turn to, Tracey, right here at your fingertips. Find and try out whatever helps you to identify, acknowledge, honor and express your feelings. As an example, just look at all the resources I’ve listed on the all Links pages of my Grief Healing Web site. There are literally hundreds of them there, and since I have personally visited and evaluated every single Web site that is listed on my Links pages, you don’t even have to expend the energy to search for them ~ all you have to do is click on the links!

The difficulty you’re having with sleeping is something you can discuss with your doctor, but you might find this article helpful as well: Coping with Sleeplessness and Insomnia in Grief.

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