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7 Months Today


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It is 7 months today that I lost my beloved Bruce. I cann't believe that he is gone 7 months. This morning I woke up with this sick feeling in my stomach. My youngest son and I took my parents home on saturday so this is the first time in almost a month that I am all by myself in the house and it is soooo quite. I just don't know what to do with myself,I miss him so much god my hurt is aching. I keep asking why us WHY? I need him he make my life worthliving. I am so sad and so loney.In less then a month we would be celebrating our 31st anniversary and now I will be going and putting flowers on him grave this is just not fair.Why did this have to happen to so us . I hate is I have no really good friend as my best friend died of cancer on Feb 6/06 so I have no one to really to talk to about what I am going through. Then Bruce dies on Jan 20/07 and then my grandmother dies on march30/07 I just don't think that I can take many more. I'm so tired.Sometimes I think that I am lossing my mind. I try to put on a happy face for our kids and everyong else around me and all I would like to do is get back in to bed and just die. How am I goung to do any other day with the way that I am feeling i'm not so sure. I guess the only good thing that has come out of this is that my parents have sold their home and got a place just 15 minutes from my home. Yet sometimes that makes me feel guilty. If not for Bruce deing and my be by myself I dont't think that they would be moving here. I'm mot sure what I'm doing these day. Well I guess that I will go and get dressed and go and bring some flowers to Bruce and go and have a little talk and big cry with him. Thank you for being their and listening to me.

Gail

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I'm sorry you're having such a hard time. I've been through a lot of that and it's so hard to deal with. You do sound like a strong lady and I know that you'll go forward as we all continue to do. I often ask my husband, who passed on 2 years ago, "Am I doing okay, dear?" I am closer to my faith now and that helps. As you know, it just takes a day or hour at a time as things build up. Some days are good, some are bad, but you do continue to hang in there. You will get through it, I know. Keep us posted.

Karen

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Gail,

Have you looked for a grief support group? It might help fill the void and who knows, you might make a new friend. You need to talk to someone, to get your feelings out.

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Karen&Kay Thank you for your posting it helps just knowing that there are people out there that understand what this feel like. As for support groups in my town I'm not to sure. I live in a small town. So thank you I think that I will look it up and see. Thank you again for being there for me and understanding what it is that I am going through

Gail

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