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A Lost Case?


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I do feel lost and desparate there are times I dont find reason to live.Itold all about my feelings tomy doctor and staring at me He asket Me if I realy trust him or do Ifeel that no body can help and Im alost cace?I told him that the reason Im vsiting Him is that Ifeel Ineed help .He said that Ishould think the way that he can help >What I do expect? I find no answer.I have to choose to go on in anew life that I dont like or no life atall.Maybe my friends from fear away can help? Thank you TENY

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Teny,

I don't know how health care is over there, but what I would ask him for is some anti-depressants, I am no doctor but they really helped me during that first year. I know that it is hard we all are facing a life that we didn't want. During the begining we just can't see past the day that we are in. As time goes on you will start to be able to see past today and see things differently. You will find a purpose in living again. For me it is working out just that way. Prayer is the other thing that will help, just ask God and he will take care of you.

Love always

Derek

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Teny,

A good doctor should understand what you are going through...but even if he or she has good training, it may be difficult for them to fully grasp what you are feeling if they have not personally gone through it themselves. As Derek said, antidepressants can help you cope, particularly in the first couple of years, until you've had more time to adjust. Talking to someone who cares or understands helps too. I have found it helps to get my feelings down in writing. And having faith in God helps, although I personally found it difficult to pray with any kind of meaning for quite some time, and I have always been a pray-er. Even now it is not the same as it was "before" but I have a sense of peace about me that communes with God even when I don't form it into words...I know He understands. Keep coming on line here and voicing yourself to us, at least you are heard and cared about.

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I pray, but not like I use to. Sometimes I feel like my prayers go unheard, I think it is still unbelief that it happened, mom had soooo many people praying for her- she wanted to live so bad! She said, You all need me- OH! God! DO WE NEED HER...... I am being forced to be a changed person and have a changed life, and I DO NOT LIKE IT! I want my mom back.

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Teny

Find a doctor that really listens. i found a wonderful one. he is my regular dr but he just let me cry and really listened. he asked me to tell him about my mom, what happened and how i felt. he kept a very close eye on me. when i could not eat , sleep or think. he said i really needed to try something. this had been 6 mos since my mom had died and i was in a black hole. i finally gave in b/c i had lost so much wt and my husband was scared. i tried the light antidepressant and it has helped greatly. i was terrified of going on one but i was seeing my therapist and she also agreed. i still go for therapy and see my priest for spiritual counseling. all of these things have helped me.

i will pray for you , i pray everynight for everyone on this site. i am going to ask God to give you the strength you need. I am here for you. Lori

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You guys are so lucky that you had a good mom. My mom is crazy and abusive and has never been a good or even a tolerable mother. She has caused us nothing but grief all our lives. I'm not sure how I'll feel when she dies...probably a lot of mixed feelings. My mother is mean, no matter what great children she has, she has treated us all badly. I would think it'd be better to have good memories of a good mother than to have one that is cruel and continually difficult to deal with. Who knows how I'll feel when she dies? I'll probably mourn what we never had.

Lorikelly,

I think you have a wonderful doctor. My doctor has been like that too. When George died, he took me in the room, shut the door, and just sat down and listened to me, asked me questions, showed compassion, told me to call him, any time of the day or night. Everyone should have a doctor like that.

No matter who we lose, husband, mother, friend, if we were close to them, they leave a huge gaping hole in our heart that noone else can fill, and it is so hard to go on without them. I cannot relate to missing a mother, I never had a decent one, but I sure know what it is to lose a husband, and I imagine it would be similar if you had a good relationship. All we can do is try to use what we have learned to try to help others and be there for them.

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