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Just Doesnt Seem Fair


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yesterday as hubby and i were driving to the post office it hit me that it was exactly 1 month that my dad passed away, and the post office we were on our way to was the same one i went to with my dad the day before he died. i started tearing up, and hubby was saying all kinds of things to get my mind off of it and to cheer me up.

the 2 unexpected deaths i have experienced in the last 2 yrs has me so afraid of death now. 2 yrs ago me, my mom and dad, my dads best friend and his wife all went out to eat adn then we all went back to my dads best friends house to hang out. well after a few min. of getting into the house and sitting down, my dads best friend went to the bathroom, his wife had to go back there with him b/c he was in a wheel chair and he had only 1 leg so she had to help him get on the toilet. well about 5 min. later his wife went and checked on him and all i heard was "charlie wake up" and my heart just sank, i just knew right then.

with my dad he was fine the day before he died, he went with me to the post office, went back home, he worked on my aunt and uncles computer, hung out with my dad before i had to go to work, he was just fine, he seemed like he did any other day. that night he went and sat on the porch with his 2 brothers like he always did on friday nights and then left to go back home and went to bed and died.

it just seems so unfair to have someone here one min. and they seem perfectly fine and then the next min. they are gone w/o warning. it just does not seem fair at all. now i have myself so angry just thinking about it.

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It isn't fair and it does make you angry! It was basically the same thing with my mom and dad. They had always been in pretty good health and then they just got sick and died. It shouldn't be a shock, but it is. I mean, people get sick and die all the time, but it never seems to be the bad ones, just the good ones. Maybe that's part of the anger. I, too, am more afraid of death now too, like I'm so afraid of who else I'm going to lose or if I'm going to die (because I have all my baby kitties to take care of). I guess that's normal. Hang in there.

Hugs,

Shell

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bmsbabygirl:

Anger is normal, I went through a lot of anger right after my dad died.

My dad's last day was filled with helping family and friends. Taking someone to get their car fixed, helping a neighbor, etc. He took a walk around the block (my dad worked out 2 hours a day/for over 30 years).Honestly I think my dad being "a health nut", was part of the shock. He never ever was sick. Actually he just had a clean bill of health from his Dr. a month before he passed. Anyway, He always loved to walk around the block right before dinner. He did that, got a glass of water and sat down in "his chair" and died.

I'm so sorry about your dad, being scared about losing others, is something I went through as well. It does get better with time, I hate saying that to you because when my grief was as fresh as yours, for some reason it annoyed me. However, it is true. God Bless, and I will keep you in my prayers.

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