10 Months

[teny]

It is 10 months today and so hard to believe.All this months Im strugling for the choices I read in abook that I have.Choose to die choose to exist until die choose to live .I have no standert place where Ilive I go every night to another house driving long distances carieng my clothes in a suitcace. I think that Im loosing My mind .The only period that Ilived for 10 days in the same place was when my son and his kids came with me at the summer house.When they had to go Igould not stay there alone.Yesterday my son told me that I can not understand that he is also grieving and that Ikeep posting here about my feelings to strangers and that my family is here and kares for me .Losing YIANY is the most devastating experienceof my life .I dont want to be Grief plus to my children.They blame me of loving their father more than Ilove them and nothing counts for me any more.The pain of loss is huge I have not mastered any of it.Im in huge dip.

[LarrysGirl]

Teny, I'm sorry you are having to go thru this grief. It has its very low points and you feel very depressed. There will be some days that aren't as bad, but it does take awhile. I have a hard time being alone also. It must be very hard for you to go from place to place. I can't imagine. But I do understand not wanting to be by yourself. I'm thinking of you and hope some peace comes your way today. Deborah

[Stallyn]

Teny,

I am sorry also, I pass my 6 month mark on Sept 2nd, so I know how hard it can be for us to cope, well I think we achieve the impossible by "surviving" each day and thats worth for us to think about

William

[teny]

THANK YOU ALL OF YOU MY FAR AWAY FRIENDS I DO HOPE FOR BETTER DAYS FOR ALL OF US WHO SUFFER THE SAME PAIN> TENY