Advice Please!

[SewJazzy]

Yesterday I lost a dear member of my family. Gizmo came into my family 10 years ago when I fostered her mother and littermates. When the rest of the kittens went up for adoption I could not part with my beautiful little grey Giz. Now she's gone and I'm lost. Gizmo was sick for one week with some type of infection. She did not respond to the antibiotics the vet gave her I.V., went into septic shock and was euthanized at 4:45 p.m. The vet suspects Feline Leukemia is the cause. Now I'm not only out of my mind with grief, but I'm terrified that I'm going to loose my other 5 cats. At this point I can't even allow myself time to grieve because I am trying to help my two heartbroken daughters deal with their pain. (They do not know about the possibility of the other cats being infected.) On top of everything I have midterms this week and a job. I'm scared to death, heartbroken, and have no idea what to do next. Maybe tomorow will be better. I should have the test results at least and know for sure what I'm dealing with. God I wish I could sleep.....

[Maylissa]

SewJazzy,

I'm sorry to hear about your loss of Gizmo, and all the other things you're having to concurrently deal with at the same time. You've got a full plate, that's for sure, and I can understand how much you must be suffering.

I'm very pressed for time lately, and also so very tired myself from my own trials, so I don't have the time to explain things in detail like I normally try to do. I'm not sure just what kind or how much advice you're asking for, but for the medical side of things, I always promote homeopathy and other holistic means of handling dis-ease in animals and humans and try to advocate for the animals' best interests, as well as for prevention of dis-ease. So in short, all I can suggest is ordering and reading our vet's book, "Small Doses for Small Animals, Homeopathic Care for Cats and Dogs," by Dr. Don Hamilton, DVM, paying particular attention to chapter 2 - "The Nature Of Disease" and other relevant sections (see "feline leukemia" in the index), where he explains this form of dis-ease (and others) and the nature of its treatment, both conventionally and homeopathically.....and then finding a holistic &/or homeopathic vet to work with for your remaining felines. (homeopathic vets can and do work by phone as well or even exclusively, depending on their set-up, so they need not live where you do) Without explaining the entire concept here, if it were me and I had a homeopathic vet (which we did) and was following their advice, I wouldn't be as worried about any remaining furkids 'catching' any such/supposed virus just because Gizmo had a dis-ease like that. So to me, that's the best thing you could do for them and yourself and at least take care of ONE part of your worries. To quote one small section from Dr. Hamilton's book, (italics are mine)"...but exposure to the organism in the majority of individuals does not produce disease. Immunodeficiency is the primary cause and must be present for infection to occur...." If this sounds more hopeful, that's because it truly IS. If you wish to learn more, you'd have to be willing to be open to re-education, the kind that would likely prolong the lives of your remaining cats. So I hope this gives you hope, such as the kind that you can't find through conventional medicine. (Dr. Hamilton used to be a conventional vet, btw)

Again, I'm so sorry for yours, your children's, and other animal companions' loss.

[MartyT]

Maylissa, thank you for taking whatever time you had to respond to SewJazzy's post. I, too, was tied up in meetings yesterday and found myself without enough time to post a message to her. I so appreciate your keeping a watchful eye on this forum

SewJazzy, let me add my voice to Maylissa's in expressing my deepest sympathy for the death of your precious Gizmo. (Just so you know, Maylissa is a long-time member of our GH family, and one of our resident experts on homeopathic veterinary care.)

In addition, I want to point you to some online resources that you may find helpful in your efforts to comfort your children in their grief:

Children and Pet Loss

Child / Adolescent Grief

Children's books on pet loss are another wonderful source of information and support, and can be an excellent way to open a discussion with your children about this. See, for example, the titles I have listed on my site's Articles ~ Columns ~ Books page, under the heading, Books for Children and Those Who Love Them. (Once on that page, you'll need to scroll down a bit until you come to that particular heading.)

[SewJazzy]

Thank you both so much for taking time out of your busy days to offer your support, knowledge, and advice. We did find out yesterday that the Feline Leuk test came back negative. I'm greatly releived, and yet upset at the same time. The reason I'm upset is that (1) I feel like a lot of un-needed pain and suffering was added at an allready unberable time, and (2) If it wasn't Feline Leuk then what the heck was wrong with my baby? She has always been perfectly healthy, and completely in-doors. This came on so suddenly... I still can't quite beleive that she's gone. I also want to let anyone that responds to my post know that it may take me awhile to reply. My youngest daughter was admitted to the hospital tonight. She's being treated for a major depressive disorder. Any of you out there who beleive in prayer or can find the time to send some good thoughts our way...I'd be deeply appreciative.

[Maylissa]

SewJazzy,

Man.....now your daughter, too?!?! Loving thoughts sent!!

(1) I feel like a lot of un-needed pain and suffering was added at an already unbearable time

But you didn't and couldn't have known, in advance, unless you're a fortune teller. So you were doing what the doc told you to do, trusting that he/she knew more than you. You simply acted on what you knew (or were told) at the time. You can't and needn't blame yourself for that.

(2) If it wasn't Feline Leuk then what the heck was wrong with my baby?

I apologize in advance, but I'll have to put on my rather 'clinical' hat here for a bit. This is the harder part to answer, because it would take pages...so again, to explain it all, you'd have to learn how the homeopathic approach works. There's a big difference between the Rationalist school of thought/approach and the Empirical (holistic) school of thought/approach, which isn't easily explained in just a few short sentences, I'm afraid. Suffice to say, the former applies a (disease) label and treats everyone the same way, while the latter bases treatment, not on a one-size-fits-all label, but on the individual's reaction to a pathogen and in its essence, only really calls it "dis-ease". But this probably won't make enough sense to you, either, unless you read up on how homeopathy works and what it's based on. However, I can tell you that it predates today's system of allopathic medicine by about 200 years and had it's beginnings in the late 1700's, by Dr. Samuel Hahnemann in Germany. In the Western world (including the US), it was squashed much later on in the 19th century, yet remained vital in many parts of Europe, Latin America and India. Today, there has been a resurgence of this fine, logical, safer, gentler and even less expensive system, whose aim is not simply to manage or mask disease, but to cure it. Our vet's book explains the entire history and logic of it better than most writings I've read. He's quite well-known and his book has even been used to teach other homeopathic students in regards to human use of homeopathy as well....that really says a lot about him!

In really, really simplistic terms, Gizmo's body wasn't strong enough to naturally and properly fight off whatever pathogen got into her. And that pathogen got in because her bodily systems weren't as strong as they could have been in the first place. You can label any dis-ease however you like, but this is what it always comes down to, so the label isn't really useful in homeopathic terms, nor does it affect which remedy is chosen for the individual. This is why, in terms of the dis-ease symptoms that have come to be called "feline leukemia", Dr. Hamilton speaks of providing immune system support, for one. It's something (but in natural forms, not drugs) you could consider for the rest of your furkids, since w/o that bodily system working well, any number of things can allow dis-ease to overpower the body. See? I told you this wouldn't be easy to explain in short! (and this is only a fraction of it)

If you have a strictly conventional vet, he/she won't understand this, either, except for the really simplistic terms, because allopathic systems are designed for treatment and not cure, though they play a good role in certain ways, such as in emergency care (though homeopathy also has a good place there, too). They treat symptoms and not causes....so it would be pointless asking them about such methods - in fact, they'll usually scoff mightily. (western thinking likes to do that) However, I KNOW homeopathy works, both from my own experiences with being treated this way and from treating our darling feline daughter this way. Would that I could have had Dr. Hamilton for my own doctor, as he's one of the best homeopathic vets in the world today. (he also utilizes a few other holistic approaches as well, if the client is open to that)

Also, being indoors doesn't, by itself, necessarily equate to good health, either....because everyone's an INDIVIDUAL, just as homeopathy says. It also depends on what substances one is subjected to, even indoors. Myself, I don't even advocate for keeping animals indoors, unless they, individually, prefer that. Outdoor jaunts, with complete and wise supervision &/or in a safe, contained, enriched and large 'run' or 'cage' is what I believe is best for better health in our fellow brethren. I know I'd go totally bonkers if I wasn't allowed to experience the outdoors my entire life.

I know this hasn't addressed your grief any, but since you're confused about what I'd said, I thought I ought to address that first. But as for the grief, and now angst about your human daughter as well, I do understand how tough that is, too. When our Sabin boy passed (a fairly sudden death), his feline sister, Nissa (the grey one in my avatar), was diagnosed with kidney insufficiency (well, the first vet incorrectly called it failure, throwing me into a total panic unnecessarily), but needless to say, I had to 'jump to' in all my guilt and sorrow and immediately start working on Nissa's grief AND dis-ease as well as my own stuff. (The silver lining, though, was that this was how I found Dr. Hamilton and put her under his primary care.) But yes, it was tough, very tough and it took Nissa a few months, rapidly losing weight and appetite and grieving heavily herself, to start coming around. Me, because of all this trauma.....I took a LOT longer, and I credit mainly my gal for helping me out of it, gradually but surely. So, things can and often do get better over time, but giving yourself enough time, too, is so important. With Nissa's passing last year, I pushed myself TOO hard and now have some regrets about 'working' my grief differently than before. So give yourself many, many breaks wherever you can, as you begin to process everything, and come back to talk about what bothers you when you can. That can help, too.

[Corinne]

SewJazzy,

I am so sorry to hear about your Gizmo. Now your daughter, you must be feeling really overwhelmed. I will pray for strength and peace for you and your daughter.

Hugs & prayers,

Corinne