13 Months Today

[teny]

It is 13 months today and my life is so unstable.As you may remember 2 months before YIANY was gone we have sold our home for an appartement buildlng.We had decided to live in our summer house by the sea .It is the house we were spending our weekends and we both loved.Since he is gone I did not have the courage to live in an isolated summer ressort alone.Until I could decide what to do I started like a fugitive spent my nights eather at brothers house or at my sons I wonderwithmyself >I used to have every thing in order and did not like to change places .Now I cant stay in the same place and keep running like a fugitive from one place to another.Its like my destiny is chasing me. TENY

[Gail_R]

Teny I'm so sorry that you are in so much pain. They say time helps...but one does not say is how much time. I guess we are all different 13 months without your beloved husband...for me it is 10 1/2 months and sometimes it feels like a life time ago that he was here with me. This is the hardest thing that we have ever had to do but we have made it this far with the help of everyone on this site...if not for this site I don't know how we would have got through these last months at lest that is true for me. Teny just know that I am here for you and so is everyone else. Hope your day gets a little better. Gail

[suzanne]

Teny & Gail

I know how each of you feel and I'm so sorry we are all in such pain. Teny I don't think we can run from it, just try to take it head-on. I reached 9 months this morning at 10:00 AM. I as well feel as if it was a lifetime ago. So this morning I held his ashes, looked at his picture into those beautiful blue eyes and cried. For what used to be, what will never be again and the painful present. There are just no words to really express it. I know William is at nine months today as well and Wendy yours is right around the corner. Hope all are getting through it. My thoughts are with each of you. But we have made it this far. I could not have done it without the support of all of you. Thank you.

Suzanne

[Gail_R]

Suzanne I'm sorry that you are have to go through this. Think that we would all sell our souls to just have them back...at lest I would. for me it will be 11 months on dec20. Like I said before sometimes it feels like a life time ago that Bruce was here with me. I think that we would No I know that he would be proud of me that I have made it this far. I also think that is what your husband and Teny's husband would be also. Take care of yourselves today. Gail

[WendyJ]

Oh my girlfriends where has the time gone? It seems like each month is going by so quickly and life goes on around us and we are in the middle in limbo waiting for the spinning to stop! It all happened so quickly for us, never knew what hit us, don't know where our lives are going. All I know is thank God we have eachother, I honestly don't know if we all would have made it without eachother !

Love,

Wendy

[Gail_R]

Wendy you are so right. I don't think any of us could get through this without each others help. Like you I am not looking forward to christmas. How about we just cancel it for this year Well it sounds like a good ideal but it would not be far to our kids. So like the last 9,10,11 months we will get through this with the help each and everyone of us on this site. Wendy it is so nice to be able to just come here and talk about anything and everything that we are going through and know that the person reading our post know exactly what it is that we are feeling. thank Wendy for being a good friend. Gail

[WendyJ]

Gail I wish I could just forget the Holiday this year as it has no more meaning for me now. I have no young children anymore but Melissa is 22 and still at home and I do have Christmas dinner this year so I am stuck. Just the thought of it stresses me to no end. Gail I don't know what I would do without you guys either, I wish you and I lived closer, I think we would be good friends !

Love,

Wendy