Lynette Posted December 15, 2007 Report Share Posted December 15, 2007 I lost my "Soulmate", Mike on November 15th, 2007. This is all real new for me and my family. My husband was diagnosed with Bladder Cancer October 2006. He made it through two major surgeries, several biopsies, and two rounds of chemo. One November 11th, 2007 I had to call an ambulance to our home because my husband was having a lot of trouble breathing. One thing I forgot to mention, my husband went from a 195lb very healthy man to weighing only 120 lbs and barely had enough fat on him for the nurses to take his blood. While he was in ICU, after countless blood test and scans, the doctors determined that Mike had MRSA/Staph infection from the portacath that was surgically put in his chest for his chemo treatments. There were several complications while in the hospital. On November 15th, he had to be taken into surgery because his right leg was not getting any blood due to a blood clot. After 6 hours, the doctor came into the waiting room where mine & his family were waiting and told us that he came through the surgery and he would be back in ICU shortly. We were all jumping for joy, laughing and hugging each other. Around 15 minutes later, the doctor came back into the waiting room and said for us to wait there, apparently there were complications when they were moving him from the OR table to his bed. Five minutes later I saw the doctor coming out of the swinging doors with his head down and that’s when I knew I had lost my one true love of my life. They said it was probably a blood clot that let loose in his leg and went up to his heart. I feel as though I don’t want to live anymore. During the week, I work so I’m staying busy, but when Friday comes around I just lose it. On Fridays we would go out and eat Mexican food and have a few drinks just to wind down from a busy week. We’d talk about things that happened at work, or camping trips in our RV that we would be planning with our family. See when I met Mike, I’d gone through a divorce and basically thought I’d never fall in love again. When he & I met, I knew this was my prince charming and he would always take care of me, he would be my strength, my “Soulmate”. We were only married 13 ½ years and those were the best years of my life. I just don’t see how I can go on and ever be happy again. I refuse to take off my rings, if someone meets me for the first time; I tell them I’m married. Is this wrong? I just can’t let go. We were at the point in our life where the children were married and having their own families so we could start enjoying our life and each other. This is so unfair. I get mad when I think about all the child molesters, wife beaters, etc. that is healthy and still walking on the streets and this has to happen to a very good, loving man. Makes no sense to me! I’m sorry that this is so lengthily, once I started typing, I just wanted someone out there to hear my story. If anyone has any suggestions, please let me know. Thank you, Lynn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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