Doubt Myself

[teny]

Hi my friends I know that holidays are hard for every one here.This morning I was helping a girl to find a gift from my collection and I heard the song YESTERDAY .I just could not go on tears came that did not stop.I asked my niece to help with the pacage and I went at the garden to pull myself together.Felt like my life is aburden on my shoulders.No matter how I try grief is hiting harder.It seems like more pills Itake more tears find their way .My therapist told me that he feels that he can not get through to me its like I have built a wall and what ever he says I doubt.That is true I duobt him Idoubt God I doubt myself.Feeling tired with no strength.I just dont want to exist if Im not able to realy live.THANK you for being here TENY

[karenb]

Well, Teny, I wish there were something I could say to help you feel better. Just so you know we're all here for you and I do feel it's good that you can write your feelings down and send them to people who really understand. Just keep trying and down the road it will get better, I know that. Take care.

Your friend, Karen

[teny]

thank you karen its 8 in the evening for me Im going to my sons home Im tired to drive but Icant stay alone.Your support is precius.TENY

[lyn]

Hi Teny,

It is normal to doubt ourselves, to doubt God and the people around us. What faith we may have with ourselves/ God before was shattered with the loss of our loved one. And building this faith again is real hard. It will take time.

Think that you have survived the first year. Try to focus only with today, that you will also survive this moment, this hour, this day. Keep posting..we care for you.

[LarrysGirl]

Teny, I was thinking of you this morning. I've struggled just like you to find a way thru this grief. I wanted you to know that the exhaustion and continual sadness are part of your grieving. It does take everything out of you. I know that you feel alone and I wanted to tell you that there are all of us here on this site that read your messages and care so much and wish for you strength to make it thru each day. Take care of yourself, try to get as much rest as you can. I know its hard. Deborah

[Stallyn]

Teny,

Doubt fills or mind move of this juncture of our lives, and its normal to be so, we loss our support and confidant to encourage us like no one else can, And standing on our own. God doesn't give up on us, thats why we are here today, I think your therapist may have been more understanding than to tell you otherwise, I have doubts every day about anything, choices I made in the past, present and maybe the future by myself is much more than we are used to.

Love,

William

[lorikelly]

Teny

I have alot of doubts and some days are worse then others.

I am praying for you that each day will get a little better for you. i wish i could say something to make you feel better. just know that i think of you often and pray for you.

Lori

[kayc]

Teny,

Just want you to know I am thinking of you and sincerely hope it gets better for you soon.

KayC

[KathyG]

Teny,

I have mourned for loved ones before, but I'm discovering that nothing exhausts a person more or shatters his or her heart like losing her spouse. How can you or I or anyone not feel devastated when the person who was the best part of our life leaves us? This is natural and normal.

When things feel like they are too much, we can look inside ourselves and gather up the strength to go on, just for a few more minutes or one more hour -- no further into the future than that. If we can keep on doing this, then after awhile we'll get stronger and be able to go on for a day, a week, or a month at a time. Have confidence in yourself; you've survived one year so far (I haven't made it through even one month yet) and you are stronger than you know.