I Need Some Help

[BrinnJ21]

I just need someone to talk to. I had to put my dog down tonight, and it was one of the hardest things that I have ever done. He was 12 years old, but I got him from the humane society and have had him for about 9 years. He was the most gentle spirit. He loved other dogs and had a heart of gold. Whenever I cried he licked the teardrops off my cheeks. I miss him so much and he has only been gone for 5 hours. I don't know how I am going to make it through the day tomorrow. Before I went to the vet, I left work so distraught that I couldn't even type. When I got to the vet they asked me if I wanted to be in the room with him. I said "yes." After they gave him the injection he died in my arms and I left the vet barely able to drive. I didn't want to have to let him go or have to make the decision. He had arthritis, but was still able to move about. He took Duramax for the pain. Then suddenly, about five days ago, he couldn't get up and had lost control of his motor functions. His legs became crippled and he whinned. When he went to the vet they gave him some Prednisone, and said that if it didn't take effect in a couple of days that it would be humane to put him down. I didn't like the idea of parting with my friend, but I couldn't bear to watch him suffer anymore. The vet said that it was probably something in his spine, either a disc or a tumor, which caused him to deteriorate so quickly, but the chances of a successful surgery were slim and even then he is an old dog.

Anyways I just need some coping solutions. Thanks, BrinnJ21

P.S. I modified this so that I could receive replies, it should work now. Let me know if it doesn't. Thanks!

[Zap-gun]

Dear Brin,

I lost my dog of six years to GME, granulomatous meningoencephalitas. It was hard to let her go in such a healthy condition. I could bear it more if she'd had a full life but being cut down in middle age was so hard. I used to tease her that she was middle aged like me.

This disease has no cure and it is not known what causes it. I could have put her on chemo but she could have died from it immediately or died from the ear infection she had because chemo is an immuno supressant. I don't understand how she had the ear infection because she had the best veterinary care in the world and I took her every year for her updates. But there was no noticible signs of ear infection on the outside. No drainage etc . etc. Her ear looked healthy. The chemo would have cost 345 dollars per week and I couldn't be with her through it. She could have died suffering and she might not have been able to enjoy herself. I'll never know if I did the right thing because if I had put her on chemo maybe she would have had a miraculous recovery. Or she could have died terribly and I had no idea which would have happened. All I know is that most of the vets said that the outcome would probably not be good and Zap was a very gregarious dog who didn't like being ill.

The grief was tremendous on the day I buried her. But I built her a memorial page on my website and I wrote a poem about her. This and all the pictures I have of her helps but I don't think I'll ever get over her and the decision I had to make to euthanize her.

I hope it's getting better. Don't feel guilty. It's the hardest thing to do but you did the right thing.

(((hugss))

Zap's mom

[rainbowbridge]

i think only the true owner " the one who loved them" has the moral high ground to decide the friends fate. after all your actions are speaking for both of u and only the two of u would know what is appropriate given the situation you and your pal are in.

[BooBooMarie]

I know what you're going through. I had to put my Simba Baby Cat to sleep last night, and I can't stop thinking about him. I guess I'm having a hard time coping also, even though I know in my heart that I made the right decision. Simba was suffering too much and I couldn't stand knowing that he was in pain. I had to let go, no matter how much I wanted him to stay here with me. I had to do what was good for Simba, not for me. But still the agony of his loss hurts so terribly.

Have faith in your heart that you made the right decision-his suffering is gone. I am not a religious person, but I do believe that people and animals have a soul...or a spirit...or an energy, whatever you want to call it, that lives on after the temporary, physical body fades away. Perhaps your religion or belief system can be of comfort to you. I have also been looking at photos of Simba when he was healthy and full of mischief, remembering the things about him that always brings a smile to my face, remembering him the way he would want to be remembered. I also plan on buying locket & putting Simba's picture in it, along with a picture of Cosmo, his brother, who passed away last year. This way they can stay close to my heart when I need them the most.

Talk to people who understand and care about your loss, stay away from those who don't. Make sure you take care of yourself - eat, sleep, go for a long walk - your dog would want you to stay strong. Cry when you have to, but also laugh when you can.

I'm sure there are other ways of coping, and I will find them as time goes on and as I need them. You will too.