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Life Without My Mother


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Upon reading the sorting message from MartyT, I hate to say this, but I went through my mother's stuff within 1 week after her passing. You see, she had just moved into an apartment and was leaving a house that was on the market to be sold, and we had a time frame to get the stuff out of the house, and if we had gotten the stuff out of the apartment in a reasonable time, we could get all the money back she put down on it for funeral expenses. My mom left us with hardly anything except her items of daily living, clothes, furniture, food, no will, and no money to bury her with. I had to have a yard sale the next week to raise money for her funeral, boy was that hard!! Being cheery while strangers are picking through your mom's things is very difficult. I raised a good amount for a "down payment" for the funeral, but that left us with the rest of the bill. Her family (brothers and sisters) barely pitched in. sad.gif and this still makes me angry. Do you know, my mother's brothers and sisters were upset at the day we picked for the funeral??? They decided to have their own funeral a week later when it was convenient for them. Has anyone ever heard of such a thing???!! mad.gif

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sad.gif I lost my mum on the 17th March 05. How do I feel I should think like evryone who has lost a loved one sad, angry, lost, lonely, hurt to think that I won't be able to see her or talk to her anymore. My bestfriend Rose lent me some books on Doris Stokes an ordinary housewife with an extraordinary gift, a clairaudient who has brought comfort and joy to millions. Rose said Dawnie you should read these maybe they will help you. I have been reading these books since we found out about mums illness. Brain Tumour terminal grade 3. I would never thought that they would help I have cried, laughed,screamed and after all that felt better well a little anyway. But one poem that will always be with me from Doris Stokes book was the one I was reading to my Mum before she took her last breath and I would love to share it with all of you I keep it in the locket Mum gave me at christmas.

It doesn't seem to long ago

we came to say goodbye,

we held your hand and kissed your face

And had our private cry.

You looked so peaceful lying there

It was hard to realize

That when you left us here on earth

You simply closed your eyes.

So if it's true what people say

We have no cause to fear

For God will take you by the hand

And ever keep you near.

We wouldn't wish for you to stay

And suffer day by day

So when God took your hand in his

It was as if to say

No need to suffer any more Mum

So let's quietly slip away.

I hope you all like it and it gives you some comfort like it gives me and I know that when I read this at Mums funeral she would of been so proud and I know she is here with me always as you family who you have lost are with you all and think of the good times not the bad times. Take care everyone my thoughts are with you all.

Dawnie.

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