3 Weeks

[LindaKoz]

Hi Amy,

This weekend was extremely difficult for me, too. Not sure why but I cried and screamed because the pain became so intense. I also want peace for all of us. I just keep taking it moment by moment and try really hard not to look too far into the future. I think I'll go to the grief support group on Thursday evening. I'm glad that yours is tomorrow night. I will continue to hold you in my prayers. Hugs.

Peace, love, and blessings,

Linda

[steely]

Thank you LindaKoz, it was my 1 month of Harold's passing yesterday. I understand why it was such an awful day. My daughter in law sent me a message about Christmas. I haven't even thought past today, everyone else goes on around me. They have children and need to show them how to live. I'm just marking time until it doesn't hurt when I breathe. I hope the grief support group helps. I'm glad mine is this evening. I really need it.

Be Well,

Amy

[Susie Q]

Dear Steely

Our circumstances are similar. My wonderful, loving and gentle yet strong husband died three months ago today from a cerebral haemorrhage. He was in the ICU for three days before they told me that all cognitive functioning had ceased. i still can't believe it and am finding it impossible to live any kind of 'happy' life without him.

Like all the people here, I find comfort in sharing with others who understand. I am now crying less through the day and am able for the most part to manage my grief some of the time, maybe for two hours before it washes over me again. I guess that signals some kind of improvement.

I try to think of what he would be saying to help me and then try to follow that advice. It's like a communication between us and it helps me.

I wish you well on this hard road. Susie Q

[steely]

Thank you Susie, thre are times that I live from minute to minute, times when it hurts to breathe. I am so sorry for your loss. It's particularly hard with brain issues. One minute I was talking to Harold and the next he was gone. Although it did take his 4 days for his body to pass. The longest 4 days of my life. I'm glad you can find a connection, I'm still at the he's gone stage. It is a very hard road. I don't know how I go on at times.

Take care,

Amy

[Stuart]

Hi Amy,

I hope this note finds you well. I completely understand your feelings about living from minute to minute. I find my emotions changing constantly. I cant find any peace in my life without my Heidi. I know she would not want me to be this upset,but I can't help it. You are right,it is a hard road.I wish you a comfortable and peaceful Monday.

Bless you,

Stuart

[LindaKoz]

Hi Stuart,

I'm so sorry that you are unable to find any peace. I think that is a state most of us find ourselves in. Give yourself permission to grieve. Your loss is very fresh and very raw. You are adjusting to a life without the woman you love and it will take a long time to heal.

It used to occur to me that Brian wouldn't want me to be so upset but then I realized that he probably would be just as upset if I had gone before him. I'm allowing myself to experience every emotion which comes to me. I'm taking life one small step at a time. What I have learned is that when I am overwhelmed by this great sadness, I need to take time to cry, scream, and yell. It is the only way that I can get through that moment. And then I find a small period of solace. I'm hopeful that in time the periods of peace will become greater than the periods of overwhelming sadness and anxiety. But, I'm not looking too far into the future for now.

Take care of yourself, my friend. Honor all of your emotions. And, know that you are not alone. We are all walking together. Hugs.

Peace, love, and blessings,

Linda

[steely]

Hi Amy,

I hope this note finds you well. I completely understand your feelings about living from minute to minute. I find my emotions changing constantly. I cant find any peace in my life without my Heidi. I know she would not want me to be this upset,but I can't help it. You are right,it is a hard road.I wish you a comfortable and peaceful Monday.

Bless you,

Stuart

Thank you Stuart,

Alas it is not be a peaceful monday. I received Harold's ashes today and the whole roller coaster started again. Death certificate friday and remains on monday, I don't know how much more I can handle. It is so hard, I know Harold would want me to continue being healthy and working towards that goal but I have lost all motivation. I can't seem to get anything accomplished. It's a big gaping whole in me and my life. I run out of words sometimes, the pain is so overwhelming. I do know how you are feeling and I am so sorry. I really hate that we have to feel this way.

Be Well,

Amy

[Korina]

Amy:

I know I have said it before, but the only thing I could do particularly so early on (hmmff, me the soul of experience at 5 months....) was to make it through each day, each hour. Please don't build up any expectations, and aside from feeling/experiencing your grief (or however such a thing should be phrased), concentrate on taking care of your diabetes. Nothing about this is easy - it really sucks - but I know you will find your way.

Hugs,

Korina