Susie Q Posted December 24, 2009 Report Share Posted December 24, 2009 Dear All It's early Christmas morning here - I'm not feeling too merry but I still send everyone lots of affection and my hopes that you will have a day with family and friends that will help sustain you through the incredible sadness. Thank you for your replies and words of encouragement and support. I have needed them. This is the first Christmas morning that I won't see him for nearly 40 years - and 32 years without Christmas presents opened on the bed. It's a lifetime really, and it's been one filled with love and happiness. It was not supposed to be like this, but here I am. Here we all are, I guess. I know that eight families somewhere are laughing and celebrating with hugs and kisses (and good health and sight) because of his commitment to organ donation. I am sure that many people in their family circle are also thinking of the wonderful person who gave their loved one this great gift. That's a nice thought. Not looking forward to the Christmas lunch or dinner - I'll be surrounded by people who are also desperately missing him - is that comforting or adding to my misery? Not sure! But it's what I need to do because sleeping through it all is just not an option. I'll have him in my heart and will keep him close beside me today as I ry to enjoy the blessings of family love and support. With all my good wishes for this Christmas day...Susie Q Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartyT Posted December 24, 2009 Report Share Posted December 24, 2009 And good wishes to you as well, Susie . . . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maryo Posted December 24, 2009 Report Share Posted December 24, 2009 Hi Everyone, I want to wish everyone a Merry Christmas. I have no doubt that this holiday will be difficult, but all my memories and yours will get us through this season. Marty, Thank you for giving us a safe place, where we can meet new friends and find comfort and understanding. Mary Lou Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrspapajohn Posted December 24, 2009 Report Share Posted December 24, 2009 Susie - - Thank you for starting this thread. I also would like to wish every one peace over these holidays. For many of us, they are "firsts" so we will have to see how we make it through. Marty - - Please accept my special wishes to you over this holiday season, and thank you so much for always being there for all of us. Kathy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat2005 Posted December 24, 2009 Report Share Posted December 24, 2009 Hi Everyone, I would like to wish all of my dear friends a Merry Christmas! It will be difficult but our memories will help carry us through. Marty, I also want to thank you for being there for all of us. I find such comfort from this wonderful site and I feel I have made some wonderful friends here. Hope you have a Blessed Holiday! Kat Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LindaKoz Posted December 25, 2009 Report Share Posted December 25, 2009 I want to add my prayers that we are all able to experience the true gifts of this Christmas seson -- hope, peace, love, and joy. It will be a very challenging Christmas this year but I hope we are all able to find comfort. Perhaps our memories will sustain us, perhaps our family and friends will lift us up . . . but know that God is carrying each of us and is the ultimate essence of light and love. You are all in my thoughts and prayers. Marty, I add my thanks for providing this site where we can gather to offer love and support for we truly understand. Peace, love, and blessings, Linda Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartyT Posted December 25, 2009 Report Share Posted December 25, 2009 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LarrysGirl Posted December 25, 2009 Report Share Posted December 25, 2009 I wish for all of you some peace in your hearts and may you find comfort in loving memories. You've been such a kind and loving source of support and I thank you. Hope your holiday is full of love! Deborah Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laurieb Posted December 25, 2009 Report Share Posted December 25, 2009 Good evening my friends, I am sending all of you out there warm hugs and prayers that you find peace tonight. It is such a hard time. Marty, I join the others in thanking you so much for providing us this site to help us heal while we go through our grief journey. Merry Christmas Laurie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rochel Posted December 25, 2009 Report Share Posted December 25, 2009 To My Lil Family Here, Today was the first day that I could say "Merry Christmas" because even with all the grief, I still do not like "Happy Holidays"...cause in light of this loss what is happy...I'm glad to see all of you show up...I wonder where Azusaman is tonight...I know that he would be here if he could....This is still a very difficult time for all of us but we can come here anytime and get away from faking it...sometimes just faking it is all we can do...Hope everybody here has a Blessed Christmas....Rochel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kath Posted December 25, 2009 Report Share Posted December 25, 2009 Christmas hugs and blessing to all of you. Wishing you all comfort and peace. Love, Kath Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Mayhew Posted December 25, 2009 Report Share Posted December 25, 2009 Merry Christmas from the UK, everyone! Those of you with children are probably waking up about now (in the States) ... and some of you have probably had a fitful sleep. Just know that I am thinking of you all and wishing you a peaceful day, filled with loving memories of your soul-mates ... try and wrap yourselves in the warmth of those memories. I wish you fun and laughter in between the tears. Be kind to yourselves today, please. Last night, at a minute past midnight I lit a candle for Cliff. Yes, I cried. But as the candle-light grew stronger, I dimmed my lounge lights and there was a strength emanating from that beautiful light ... the light that he is in my life. My tears stopped and I just lay there, bathed in the soothing peaceful light, surrounded by my sleepy dogs. I got such a feeling of peace that I decided to sleep on the couch for a while ... and did so till the early hours before retiring to that big old empty bed (not counting the dogs). Christmas Eve was harder for me than Christmas Day. I'd like to reassure you that I got through it, so you will get through today. Yes, there is pain, but there is also light. I know that for some of you, who have been widowed more recently, you are in such darkness right now that you cannot see it. But the light that your soulmate is in in your life is still there ... and you will see it again one day, I promise. I'll be thinking of you all today, and would like to take this opportunity to thank you all for being there for me and for each other ... and Marty, what can I say? What other on-line Counsellor is looking after her flock at 01h30 on Christmas Eve/Day? I'd hazard a guess that you were quite alone in doing so and there are no words beyond, "thank you" for your selfless behaviour. You truly are a light in all of our lives and we are so blessed to have you. Kay, Wendy, Kath, Marsha, Valley, CarrieBoo, Jeanne, Walt, Fred, Dusky et al ... thank you for holding my hand and gently encouraging me at the start of my journey. PJ, Kathy, Mark, Joanna, Korina et al ... thank you for holding my hand and walking next to me this year ... and to those of you who I feel I haven't really met yet (due to working ridiculous hours these past couple of months), I do read your posts and remember that part of my journey only too well ... I'd like to pluck you off the path and move you to where I am and beyond, but I can't. My heart goes out to each and every one of you today of all days. I think we really do encapsulate the spirit of Christmas (not the commercialized version) by being here for each other and helping each other, even though each one of us experiences our own pain - there is no more sacred a gift - thank you all. Have a peaceful Christmas. When I return home tonight after spending the afternoon / early evening (and dinner) with good friends on the coast, I shall be lighting two candles. One for my Cliffy, and one for all of your soulmates ... it doesn't seem enough, but I can't think of what else to do. So, there will be a light flickering in the London area for Bob, Tom, Neal, Steve, Denny, Stephen, David, Jeannie, George et al this evening. I hope that some of the strength from that candle-light reaches across the ocean whilst you are sitting down to Christmas Dinner. It is always a risk to name people, in case you omit someone. Please know that I didn't intend to ... and that you are all in my heart. Love and peace to you today, and light Boo xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MartyT Posted December 25, 2009 Report Share Posted December 25, 2009 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kayc Posted December 28, 2009 Report Share Posted December 28, 2009 Perhaps some of you are feeling a sense of relief that Christmas has passed. I know there isn't a Christmas goes by but what I am reminded of my time in life with George and the special Christmases we shared. And I miss him...and I always will. I've long ago let go of expectations that life should ever be the same again, and accepted the fact that there is noone who will ever be like him or treat me like he did. He was truly special. But I have learned to embrace the good in what is in the here and now...that is pretty hard to do when grief is new, and it does take time to adjust to the changes. I hope you all survived Christmas and that it gets a little easier with each passing year, for all of you. I know it's never the same again, but I hope that with family and friends it has some good left in it...if not now, eventually. I wish you all a better year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Mayhew Posted December 28, 2009 Report Share Posted December 28, 2009 Kay, this is exactly what I was referring to in my last post (above yours) ... you have just reached me with words that bring me peace and a glimmer of hope. Thank you as always xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jo got the keys? Posted December 29, 2009 Report Share Posted December 29, 2009 Just came back to wish you all a Happy New Year, and was drawn to this topic. Although I have been absent for quite a while now, your sentiments resound in me as well. I could never forget the warmth and wisdom of your collective welcome when I came crawling to you back in the summer, totally devastated by everything that had hit me. I do not exaggerate when I say that I don't know what I would have done without your caring concern. And I hope to be back again soon. I was forced to put my grieving on a shelf, as I had to concentrate totally on my own treatment, but that does not mean that the work is not there, demanding to be done, and I would hope to be able to count on your help once again. I found it soooooo beneficial. Although I have been working with a number of therapists for the past two years, nothing I have experienced there was even close to what your posts were able to transmit, and soothe. Thank you, once again. May we all find serenity, health and some form of happiness in this new year. As they say here in Spain, a new year, a new life. Let's hope it's so! Much love to all, Susan PS Should probably tell you that my body's response to the treatments has been very good, and although I have been very, very ill, the prognosis is good. But somehow, and I'm sure you'll understand, spending my first Christmas without Jo overshadowed the good news. Hope my spirits will pick up after the holiday season is over. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Mayhew Posted December 29, 2009 Report Share Posted December 29, 2009 Susan, I was overjoyed to see your name posted here! Even more so to learn that your prognosis is good :-) YAY! Thankfully Christmas is over for this year now .... this first one is so hard, isn't it? "Salud y muchas pesetas a ti" for 2010 xxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jo got the keys? Posted December 29, 2009 Report Share Posted December 29, 2009 Susan, I was overjoyed to see your name posted here! Even more so to learn that your prognosis is good :-) YAY! Thankfully Christmas is over for this year now .... this first one is so hard, isn't it? "Salud y muchas pesetas a ti" for 2010 xxxxx Gracias, Boo! Especialmente salud!!!! Y para ti tambien, corazón. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Mayhew Posted December 29, 2009 Report Share Posted December 29, 2009 Si, especialmente salud Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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