spela Posted March 10, 2005 Report Share Posted March 10, 2005 I am new to this forum. My dearest friend died six weeks ago. January 27th. He was struggling with liver cancer for 3 years. We believed he would be all right. The cancer didn't spread and it seemed obvious he would recover!He was so optimistic all the time, so positive, so brave ... On his birthday, on 25th January, he felt horrible pain and was taken to hospital. He died two days later. He was 32 years old ... I'll be 27 in April - am already afraid of that day. How will I manage without him???? The only comfort is that I was there, all the time, while he was dying. I was holding his hand, telling him that I love him and he would never be alone ... But why??? I miss him terribly, though I strongly believe he is still with me. He will always be. But it's so different ... And I'm so lonely ... I can't imagine that I could ever love anyone else. I will always love him. How could god be so unfair???Someone wrote in another topic that he (she?) feels the presence of his/her fiance. I believe that we never really die. On the night when he died my friend dreamt about us - that we were holding hands. Which we were. On the night before the funeral I dreamt about him. He said "thank you". And just after the funeral, while I was going home, I felt so clearly his presence - so clearly, that I KNEW he could'n be in the grave! How could he if he's here with me! After that I haven't had such a strong feeling ... But I still believe. And I talk to him. I've been crying a lot. I cried when a co-worker told us his girlfriend gave birth to a son ...I know this message is confused - which reflects my emotions ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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