Another Week

[PopPop]

Well, it's Monday and the start of another work week and my tenth week without Robin. I'm finding one of the hardest things is going home at the end of the day and not having my best friend to talk with about the nonsense going on at work. I'm really getting tired of hearing about my co-workers personal and financial problems. I wonder how any of them would react if they had a REAL PROBLEM and if they'd like to trade places? I just don't have the tolerance for people like I used to and it would feel so good to go off on someone but I try to keep my emotions in check. In our relationship I was the tolerant one and Robin was the one who wouldn't put up with anyone's BS. I guess the change in me is part of Robin's legacy. Not necessarily a good part but a part of it none the less. That's my rant for now. Thanks for listening.

[Jennalee]

I too get annoyed watching people fret about job cuts and money. This stuff used to matter to me, but it doesn't now. I know I'm being unfair, but I can't help but get angry at the world for going on when my world has come crashing down on me. I also find myself thinking mean horrible thoughts, such as, "Why couldn't it have been her husband?" I see happy couples walking around and it just ticks me off. I want to kick them or break them up. Anger is something I'm really struggling with right now. This whole grief thing would be a lot less complicated if it was just sorrow, but it's not. There are about a hundred more negative emotions piled on top of the gut wrenching sorrow and that just makes things worse.

[MartyT]

Jennalee, dear, you might find this thread helpful: Anger, Rage and Helplessness

[Jennalee]

Jennalee, dear, you might find this thread helpful: Anger, Rage and Helplessness

THANK YOU! I'll take all the help I can get. This is just so difficult/frustrating/horrible... well, y'all already know!

[Korina]

I have to admit that I have often wished that someone else had died in Scott's place. Not proud to wish ill on others, but I think it is just a symptom of missing Scott so much.

When I felt really angry (combined with many tears), I beat up the bed and screamed into pillows.

Korina

[Cheryl]

HI PopPop,

I think for the rest of my life I will look at most people and think to myself, they don't even know how painful life can be. Most people's problems seem so silly to me now too. I can't relate to there world. I go to the grocery store and I wonder, is there anyone else walking the isles feeling like me, grieving like me? Today I got my nails done because I couldn't spend another minute alone in the house and I knew it would take at least two hours. The lady next to me was asked what she was doing for the holiday weekend and she respnded, "Nothing it would have been our anniversery and I know I won't be good company." I should have said something to her but I didn't, now I'm kicking myself. She probably whould have loved someone to ask or care. It just caught me off gaurd.

Oh PopPop I hope things get easier for you. I'm so sorry Robin died. Cheyl

[closs86]

Hi

Cheryl you said it all, it is so true, people just don't know

karen