WaltC Posted May 23, 2005 Report Share Posted May 23, 2005 I just found this site and have read the latest posts - many are heartbreaking. My wife for over 40 years died on April 13th just two days after her 59th birthday. She had lived with MS for over 20 years and went to the hospital in early January with swallowing difficulties.We both thought that this was "just" another stage of her MS.BUT we were devasted to be told that she had cancer which had spread to her liver. She was not expected to live beyond the end of the month.She was admitted to Palliative Care on January 8th.She was a very determined lady, who NEVER complained about her disability. She lived to arrange a surprise birthday party for our daughter, held in the Patient's Lounge.I miss her so very much - we will ALWAYS be married until my death do us part. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spela Posted May 24, 2005 Report Share Posted May 24, 2005 I'm sorry for your wife. My dearest friend died of cancer almost 4 months ago, two days after his 32nd birthday which he never had a chance to celebrate, he was in such pain for the last two days ... I'm not going to tell you that life goes on, as some people say and think that should make you feel better. No life changes completely. It even seems impossible to understand how come that the world didn't stop that day ... I believe you'll be married not only until your death, but also after ... Take care! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
diron Posted May 27, 2005 Report Share Posted May 27, 2005 (((Walt))) I am sorry to read about your losing your wife. This is such a difficult time, I hope you take care of yourself. There is so much to get "used" to while we are grieving. My Ron promised my 80 years of marriage, he lied. I can laugh at that because it brings back good memories of our life together. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissyBrown Posted May 29, 2005 Report Share Posted May 29, 2005 Dear Walt, I am sorry to hear of you wife's passing. May God give you the straigth you will need to carry on it will be hard I know and I will keep you in my prayers. God Bless you from Missy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WaltC Posted May 29, 2005 Author Report Share Posted May 29, 2005 Good morning spela, diron and Missy Brown Thank You all for your comments and concern. Yesterday was another rough day for me - the 6 week anniversary of my wife's funeral. I have decided to wear my wife's wedding ring and it actually fits on the same finger as my ring that she put there over 40 years ago. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WaltC Posted June 8, 2005 Author Report Share Posted June 8, 2005 FIVE months ago today my wife was admitted to Palliative Care. EIGHT WEEKS ago she died at 9:15 in the morning with myself and our two adult children at her bedside. FOREVER I will love her and cherish her memories. How long is FOREVER? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spela Posted June 8, 2005 Report Share Posted June 8, 2005 Hi Walt,oh I just don't know what to say ... it seems unreal, doesn't it - that the world hasn't stopped, that people still do things, that time does go by, that the sun still rises every day ... it's been almost 5 months since Janez died - it will be 19 weeks tomorrow. it just doesn't make any sense ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WaltC Posted June 21, 2005 Author Report Share Posted June 21, 2005 I was climbing out of a pit of grief and almost reached the topI remembered her face and beautiful voice and started to drop and dropThe days are so lonely without my wifeI often wonder if there’s purpose to lifeI really have no will to live I just have no more tears to giveThis work of grief is too damn hardI don’t know why her life was marredShe never complained through all her painYet I’m the one who does remain.It’s just not fair, it’s just not rightSoon I will give up this fight. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LBA Posted June 21, 2005 Report Share Posted June 21, 2005 Walt:Hang in there even though it’s so tough. I read in your earlier post that you are able to wear your wife’s wedding ring. That’s awesome. What a testimony of your love for her. When others see this ring, they will see how important she was to you. I am at 19 weeks and four days since my precious wife went home to be with the Lord. She died after battling ovarian cancer for seven years, and I was with her when she took her last breath. I have never known pain so raw and deep, I could not anticipate this, it simply defies explanation. To honor my wife, I had my wedding ring, and her two wedding rings, re-made into one. I can not even describe the honor it is for me to place “our” rings on my wedding ring finger. Walt, please hang in there, may God Almighty Bless and Comfort you. I’ll be praying for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charlie Posted June 22, 2005 Report Share Posted June 22, 2005 Dear Walt, We all feel your pain. I lost my husband of 46 years on Oct 20, 2004 to cancer. I cannot tell you it will get better, I can only tell you we go on. Fathers day was especially painful for my children and July 1 would have been my husbands 67 birthday. I am dreading that day. I try to take it one day at a time, but often wonder were my life is going now and how do I continue this thing alone. We just do it, so hang in there, we understand your grief.Your friend on this journeyGrace Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WaltC Posted June 22, 2005 Author Report Share Posted June 22, 2005 Dear Walt, We all feel your pain. I lost my husband of 46 years on Oct 20, 2004 to cancer. I cannot tell you it will get better, I can only tell you we go on. Fathers day was especially painful for my children and July 1 would have been my husbands 67 birthday. I am dreading that day. I try to take it one day at a time, but often wonder were my life is going now and how do I continue this thing alone. We just do it, so hang in there, we understand your grief.Your friend on this journeyGraceGraceThanks for your encouragement - it is truly helpful to have a friend on this journey. Yes, it is tough and July 1st will most certainly be a meaningful day for you and your children. As you say, all we can do is take one day/step at a time and hopefully accomodate (not "get over") our loss.Kindest regardsWalt C. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WaltC Posted June 26, 2005 Author Report Share Posted June 26, 2005 For forty years we lived together in happiness and painFor twenty years she also lived with MS and never once complainedChristmas came and as usual she made sure all were happy, even thought she knew her condition was getting very crappyIn early January she could no longer hide her conditionShe could not take her medications so had to see a physicianThen came the devastating news – inoperable cancer!WHY, oh Why someone like her - I guess there is NO answerTwo weeks, or three the doctors said -“Talk to each other* - for soon she would be dead.I guess they didn’t know her strength and her need to liveFor she still had many gifts her family to give.She planned her daughter’s birthday party, invited guests and remained so hardy.She told her kids to look after their dad,Even thought that made them sad.Finally after her own birthday came and wentThe family gathered around her bedOne last breath and she was goneIt’s so darn hard to carry on.I don't pretend to be a poet - but it helps a little to write of my loss. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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