Losing Someone To War

[Liv]

I'm 23 and one month ago I lost my fiance.He was a marine serving in Iraq.On 5/8/2005 he was shot and killed during an operation.This is all so new to me. I can't believe he is gone and that when his unit gets back he won't be there. We had so many plans. Not only the wedding but with life, children, growing old together. I just don't know what to do some days. It has been hard to relate to anyone that knows what I am going through. Lately sleeping is getting harder. When I have a good day I think maybe I'm healing but then I'm thrown a really bad day and I'm heartbroken all over again.

Some of the hardest times have been getting letters in the mail, from him still, since mailing is delayed from Iraq to the US. They are comforting but sad at the same time. I just want to open this up to anyone who might be going through what I am. I still have his stuff to go through and that is hard.What do you keep? What do you give to the family? This is short and there is so much I wanna say but can't at the moment.I just wanted to get this topic out there because I know with this war many young people are losing the ones they love. Can anyone relate?

[spela]

I'm sorry for your loss. I'd like to say to you to be gentle with yourself. You don't have to make any decisions yet about his stuff. One month is a very short time. After almost 5 months I still sometimes feel like it couldn't have happened, like it's just a nightmare. I think it must be even harder to accept it if you were not there when he died and you were told about it. Don't be hard on yourself and let yourself feel what you feel. Take care.

[Liv]

Thanks Spela.