What Do I Do?

[tootie]

My mom passed away 2 & 1/2 years ago, & my dad almost a year ago.

When mom did she was creamated & one of my brothers soon took over. He took her ashes to his home & she was to be burried with my dad when he went, per my dad's wishes.

Now almost a year after his death, my brother will not have services for them.

There are 9 in my family, 2 have not been around for years, but the rest of us were a very close family till mom passed.

There are 2 of us girls that have talked very often about all of this, but noone else will come with us to talk to our brother.

We have talked to him to no avail.

I have no clue as to what to do any more. All I want is to be able to go & visit my mom & have some place to be able to be all alone with her. But I am an out cast at my brothers, because I have had the nerve to speak up as to my wishes.

I am lost I do not know what to do or where to even attempt to find help.

[WaltC]

Good Morning Tootie

I am sorry to read about the loss of your parents and "troubles" with your brother.

Have you suggested dividing the remains?

I understand that your brother may want to keep the ashes close to him,

but I would hope that he can understand that other relatives and friends

may want to have a location where they can visit and pay their respect.

When my wife died each child (2) wanted to keep a small urn with her remains

and we buried a larger urn at the cemetary where I can visit as often as I like.

Kindest regards

[tootie]

Walter,

Thank you so much for your suggestion, although I fear it will never work here. You see my brother is a complete ass & noone can get through to him.

I do not believe it is the fact that he wants them close, I believe it is a major power trip for him.

He has them & everything else & don't want to share & as long as he procrastonates, he does not have to. Also as long as I am the only child that is persuing the whole matter he will not cave.

So sorry to hear of your loss, my best to you & yours.

I know how hard it is to lose someone you care so much for.