qbee817 Posted September 25, 2005 Report Share Posted September 25, 2005 I haven't visited this site for awhile. I thought I had a handle on my grief but I was so wrong. It's been 15 months since I lost companion/best friend. It's been a struggle with all these stages I go thru. Struggle, struggle, struggle. I'm sick of it. I'm sick of feeling like this, sick of missing him, sick of trying to get thru this, sick of it all. All day I've been fighting tears or giving in to them. I went back to grief counseling last week. I was starting a new chapter in my life after a divorce after 25 years of marriage. It took me over 3 years after the divorce to even be interested in companionship again. I met the most wonderful person of my entire life, who brought out the love in me that had been buried over the years. We were together only 6 months and he died suddenly in our living room. I am lost and I don't even want to have a heart anymore. I know there a so many people who have been thru worse than me, but all I wanted to be was happy. I had been unhappy for so many years and I found happiness and love. Then in a matter of minutes he was ripped away. I don't understand and know there is no way to understand. Thanks for listening and I just hope someone can relate to these crazy thoughts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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